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Increasing petrol rate will be a solution for growing traffic and pollution

Increasing petrol rate will be a solution for growing traffic and pollution VBagw
The means of travelling has been changed nowadays. Most of the people are using their own vehicles instead of opting for public transport which eventually resulting in the increasing of traffic and pollution. However, hike in the price of petrol may be a best option to control the heavy traffic and raised pollution. In my opinion, raise in petrol price have both advantages and disadvantages. Everyday we come across the traffic jam in the roads, because of the high usage of private vehicles like motor bikes, cars, etc instead of public transport and their is drastic raise in levels of pollution i. e, sound pollution and air pollution which is due to the emission of harmful gases and loud noise from the vehicles. Last week, I came across an video in which a news channel is covering a middle class people problems on the inflation of petrol cost. In that, a person states that he works as an employee in a private company where he has to travel for long distance which takes more time to reach his office when travelling by public transport and he also said that he should be report at office in time, if not he will get punished like getting scolded or cutting of monthly salaries. Moreover, if this continuous daily he will get dimissed from his job. To overcome this problem he
The means of travelling has been
changed
nowadays. Most of the
people
are using their
own
vehicles
instead
of opting for public transport which
eventually
resulting in the increasing of traffic and
pollution
.
However
, hike in the price of petrol may be
a
best option to control the heavy traffic and raised
pollution
. In my opinion, raise in petrol price have both advantages and disadvantages.
Everyday we
come
across the traffic jam in the roads,
because
of the high usage of private vehicles like motor bikes, cars, etc
instead
of public transport and
their
is drastic raise in levels of
pollution
i. e, sound
pollution
and air
pollution
which is due to the emission of harmful gases and loud noise from the vehicles. Last week, I came across
an
video in which a news channel is covering a middle
class
people
problems on the inflation of petrol cost. In that, a person states that he works as an employee in a private
company
where he
has to
travel for long distance which takes more time to reach his office when travelling by public
transport and
he
also
said that he should be report at office in time, if not he will
get
punished like getting scolded or cutting of monthly salaries.
Moreover
, if this continuous daily he will
get
dimissed
from his job. To overcome this problem
he
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IELTS essay Increasing petrol rate will be a solution for growing traffic and pollution

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
227 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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