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In the developed and developing countries, the products produced from skin, bone of beasts are supposed unessential to food or medicine and even clothing. From my perspective, I would argue that I agree with opinions for clothes, treatment; however I have some opposite views for the rest of element, particularly food

In the developed and developing countries, the products produced from skin, bone of beasts are supposed unessential to food or medicine and even clothing. From my perspective, I would argue that I agree with opinions for clothes, treatment; however I have some opposite views for the rest of element, particularly food mX5xO
In the developed and developing countries, the products produced from skin, bone of beasts are supposed unessential to food or medicine and even clothing. From my perspective, I would argue that I agree with opinions for clothes, treatment; however I have some opposite views for the rest of element, particularly food. One the one hand, it is a good idea that animals and wild animals are not crucial for clothing. Such people who are well-heel or fashion enthusiasts are able to spend lots of money to possess items such as bag, shoes and coat crafted from natural skin or fur of brand-name, without think that is behavior lack of morality. In fact, the use of skin or fur is perhaps consequent the illegal hunting of rare like albino crocodile, fox, and so on. Moreover, rarer individuals like rabbits, cows are also treated badly, locked in a cramped cage, without water and feed for several days before being strike highly by a stick, stomped on the head or raked for fur and skin as soon as they were alive. Therefore, behind the perfect smoothness of expensive goods are the dark facts, unethical of this million-dollar industry. Second what is condemned here is the use of animals on the prohibited list for medicine or nutritional purposes. For example, many people hunted bear to cultivate bear gall which serve for nutrition, health enhancement. On the other hand, I believe that the act of using animal for food or drug research are not entirely bad behavior. First, it cannot deny that this source of food for our daily consumption comes from animals like cows, pigs, and so on, which are allowed categories, thereby stopping the consumption of animal meats is completely impossible. It up to the individual to choose whether the source of protein is from animal or vegan. To sum up, I believe that as the medicine more and more develops people will have better way to make drug from plants, for example. As well as there will have good stuff to create beautify or even expensive clothes. Therefore, it not necessary that only supply from animals.
In the developed and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
, the products produced from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skin
, bone of beasts
are supposed
unessential to food or medicine and even clothing. From my perspective, I would argue that I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with opinions for clothes, treatment;
however
I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
opposite views for the rest of element,
particularly
food.

Did you mean "on"?
One
the one hand, it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are not crucial for clothing. Such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are well-heel or fashion enthusiasts are able to spend lots of money to possess items such as bag, shoes and coat crafted from natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skin
or fur of brand-name, without
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that is
behavior lack of morality. In fact, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skin
or fur is perhaps consequent the illegal hunting of rare like albino crocodile, fox, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Moreover
, rarer individuals like rabbits, cows are
also
treated
badly
, locked in a cramped cage, without water and feed for several days
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
being
Consider using a past participle here: "stricken", "struck".
strike
highly
by a stick, stomped on the head or raked for fur and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skin
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as they were alive.
Therefore
, behind the perfect smoothness of expensive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
are the dark facts, unethical of this million-dollar industry. Second what
is condemned
here is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
on the prohibited list for medicine or nutritional purposes.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
hunted bear to cultivate bear gall which serve for nutrition, health enhancement.

On the other hand
, I believe that the act of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
for food or drug research are not
entirely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
behavior.
First
, it cannot deny that this source of food for our daily consumption
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
like cows, pigs, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on, which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
categories, thereby stopping the consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
meats is completely impossible. It up to the individual to choose whether the source of protein is from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
or vegan.

To sum up, I believe that as the medicine more and more develops
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will have better way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
drug from plants,
for example
.
As well
as there will have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
stuff to create beautify or even expensive clothes.
Therefore
,
It seems that a verb is missing after "it". Please verify.
it
not necessary that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
supply from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
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IELTS essay In the developed and developing countries, the products produced from skin, bone of beasts are supposed unessential to food or medicine and even clothing. From my perspective, I would argue that I agree with opinions for clothes, treatment; however I have some opposite views for the rest of element, particularly food

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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