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In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message dAmr
There are various types of cultures, however, every culture have their ethics different from each other. Some cultures believe that if any child is dedicated to his work and studies, he may achieve anything he wants. This essay will discuss the advantage and disadvantage of this opinionEvery child wants to be successful in his future, but to achieve that success hard work and patience is necessary. A dream or a goal without a hard work is just a dream. If every elder people in their culture helps their children with good guidance and constantly telling them if you do hard work it will surely pay you. There are various advantages of this opinion, for example, children often give up easily, if they are failed in exams so his/her parents or any experience individual in their culture guides them by telling, it's okay you are failed you should keep doing your hard work one day you will succeed, it will motivate the younger ones, even it will help children to increase their self -confidence and last not the least even it will help them to build their characters. To illustrate, in India UPSC is the toughest exam, because it checks your thinking ability, general knowledge, and current affairs, etc. Once in a year, this exam is held around 10 lakh aspirants apply for this exam and only 1000 are selected. UPSC is cracked by their hard work, dedication, and patience. Most of the students do re-appear for the exam, however, they have set a goal in front of them to become IAS, IPS, and IFS. On the other hand, there are some disadvantages of this statement. First of all, dedicated to one goal, and if you are not successful in achieving that you should have a plan B. Secondly, smart-work is needed every individual will tell them to do hard work often they miss telling about smart work. lastly, rectify your mistake from past if they don't then there is no use of hard work. By taking everything into account. I think this sentence has both advantage and disadvantage, but advantage outweigh disadvantage.
There are various types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
,
however
, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
have their ethics
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from each other.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
believe that if any child
is dedicated
to his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and studies, he may achieve anything he wants. This essay will discuss the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disadvantage
of this
Possible spelling mistake found.
opinionEvery
child wants to be successful in his future,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to achieve that success
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and patience is necessary. A dream or a goal without a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a dream. If every elder
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
their children with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
guidance and
constantly
telling them if you do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
it will
surely
pay you. There are various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
of this opinion,
for example
, children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
give up
easily
, if they
are failed
in exams
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
his/her parents or any experience individual in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
guides them by telling, it's okay you
are failed
you should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
doing your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
one day you will succeed, it will motivate the younger ones, even it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
children to increase their self -confidence and last not the least even it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to build their characters. To illustrate, in India
Possible spelling mistake found.
UPSC
is the toughest exam,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
checks
your thinking ability, general knowledge, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
affairs, etc. Once in a year, this exam
is held
around 10 lakh aspirants apply for this exam and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
1000
are selected
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
UPSC
is cracked
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, dedication, and patience. Most of the students do re-appear for the exam,
however
, they have set a goal in front of them to become IAS, IPS, and IFS.
On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages of this statement.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, dedicated to one goal, and if you are not successful in achieving that you should have a plan B.
Secondly
, smart-work
is needed
every individual will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
them to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
they miss telling about smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
lastly
, rectify your mistake from past if they don't then there is no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. By taking everything into account. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this sentence has both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disadvantage
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
outweigh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disadvantage
.
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IELTS essay In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
352 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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