Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In some country owning a home rather than renting one it's important to some people. What might be the case. Do you think it is positive or negative

In many nations, owning their own home plays a significant role in people’s lives. The underlying reasons for this tendency are mainly the perception of wealth and pride associated with buying a home as well as the financial benefits it brings about. However, I believe that this trend has a negative impact on society. There are a number of factors explaining why it is significant for many citizens to purchase their own house. Firstly, having a property is considered to be a sign of wealth and pride in many cultures. For example, many parents in Asian countries, such as China and Vietnam, teach their children to be diligent and save money so that they can buy a house in the future. Furthermore, homeownership also brings various long-term financial benefits. In many cases, the amount of money used to rent a house in many consecutive years is equal to or even more than the money to purchase one when added up. Therefore, some individuals even apply for a mortgage to be able to afford a house. On the whole, I believe that this tendency influences our society negatively in some aspects. On the individual level, while some may think that this motivates many individuals to work harder, I would argue that it creates a considerable burden on them, both financially and mentally. As a result, they might live under enormous pressure or even go bankrupt because of weak budget management. On the macro level, the larger the number of people who desire to purchase a home is, the more expensive these properties become. Consequently, it may increase the difficulty in buying one and create a variety of housing problems for the government. In conclusion, not only is the desire of homeownership in some countries associated with the cultural factor, but it also results from many perceived financial advantages in the long run. As a consequence, it possibly leads to putting financial and mental pressure on the buyer and results in higher prices of houses and apartments in general.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations, owning their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
home plays a significant role in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. The underlying reasons for this tendency are
mainly
the perception of wealth and pride associated with buying a home
as well
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
benefits it brings about.
However
, I believe that this trend has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on society.

There are a number of factors explaining why it is significant for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
citizens to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
.
Firstly
, having a property
is considered
to be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
of wealth and pride in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cultures.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parents in Asian countries, such as China and Vietnam, teach their children to be diligent and save money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
in the future.
Furthermore
, homeownership
also
brings various long-term
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
benefits. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cases, the amount of money
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to rent a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
consecutive years is equal to or even more than the money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
one when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
up.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals even apply for a mortgage to be able to afford a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.

On the whole
, I believe that this tendency influences our society
negatively
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
aspects. On the individual level, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this motivates
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals to work harder, I would argue that it creates a considerable burden on them, both
financially
and mentally.
As a result
, they might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
under enormous pressure or even go bankrupt
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of weak budget management. On the macro level, the larger the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who desire to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
a home is, the more expensive these properties become.
Consequently
, it may increase the difficulty in buying one and create a variety of housing problems for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

In conclusion
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
is the desire of homeownership in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries associated with the cultural factor,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
results from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
perceived
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
advantages in the long run. As a consequence, it
possibly
leads to putting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
and mental pressure on the buyer and results in higher prices of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
and apartments
in general
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay In some country owning a home rather than renting one it's important to some people. What might be the case. Do you think it is positive or negative

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
337 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts