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In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health and fitness is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them

In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health and fitness is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them qErD
Body weight has always played a role on people's health and fitness so over weight is a reason in some countries facing health and fitness problems. Unhealthy eating habit and less exercise might be the key reasons of this problem and overall daily habit can make an impact on anyone's body as well. Social campaign and individual understanding could be the easiest way to solve this problem. There are no doubts, many countries are experiencing people are eating unhealthy foods or junk food for in their meal time for example, Burger, PIzza. On the other hand, if we look at supershop's shelf we will see most of the packing snacks contain high level of sugar like Milo, Nescafe products even in butter. Therefore, we always choose delicious foods instead of noticing proportion of values. Moreover, children nowadays do not go outside more like before because they get all games and entertainment in their house so they have less facility to move their body parts. There is no immediate solution for this matter but we can do many things to solve this problem. However, Social campaign against eating junk foods could be a option to solve it because of people are well aware about how our daily routine is being effected by our eating habit then they will change it. At the same time we have to find immediate benefit of eating fresh foods and exercise becasue we as a human look for quick feedback for example, how our daily works can be smooth if we do daily workout and input fresh healthy foods and how it can help us to boost our energy level. Furthermore, government can take in initiative to maintain sugar level in drinks and packing snacks in order to maintain whole country's people. If government takes the initiative then we might feel bore eating less sugar snacks but it will give long term benefit and I believe it will increase life expectancy as well.
Body weight has always played a role on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's health and fitness
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
over weight is a reason in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries facing health and fitness problems. Unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
habit and less exercise might be the key reasons of this problem and
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
habit can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an impact on anyone's body
as well
. Social campaign and individual understanding could be the easiest way to solve this problem.

There are no doubts,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries are experiencing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
or junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
for in their meal time
for example
, Burger,
Possible spelling mistake found.
PIzza
.
On the other hand
, if we look at
Possible spelling mistake found.
supershop
's shelf we will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
most of the packing snacks contain high level of sugar like Milo, Nescafe products even in butter.
Therefore
, we always choose delicious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
instead
of noticing proportion of values.
Moreover
, children nowadays do not go outside more like
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
all games and entertainment in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they have less facility to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
their body parts.

There is no immediate solution for this matter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we can do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things to solve this problem.
However
, Social campaign against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
could be
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
option to solve it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are well aware about how our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
routine is
being effected
by our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
habit then they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
it. At the same time we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
find immediate benefit of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and exercise
Possible spelling mistake found.
becasue
we as a human look for quick feedback
for example
, how our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
works can be smooth if we do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
daily
workout and input fresh healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and how it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to boost our energy level.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can take in initiative to maintain sugar level in drinks and packing snacks in order to maintain whole country's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
takes the initiative then we might feel bore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
less sugar snacks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it will give long term benefit and I believe it will increase life expectancy
as well
.
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IELTS essay In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health and fitness is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
327 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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