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In some countries, owning a home rather than ranting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In this modern era, owning home rather than renting has the most important things for people in some countries. I perceive that is positive as well as negative effect and its depend on situation. In this essay, I will explain both point of view with few example. There are many advantages of owning home. Firstly, that is give safety and security to people. Therefore, they can focus on other significant roles, and gives time to their family. Study conducted, the government of United kingdom, employees are focusing on purchase home during their life. However, Some people purchase home by tacking loan, which gives burden and strees on owner. Secondly, some time people are stuck in situation when they are not able to give instalment and then they are not focusing on their future. To put it in the nutshell, owning home without any burdun has positive and it has also negative effect when people take loan. Therefore it is depend on situation. I believe it has both situation.
In this modern era, owning home
rather
than renting has the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries. I perceive
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
as well
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect and its depend on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
. In this essay, I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
both point of view with
Possible agreement error. The noun example seems to be countable; consider using: “few examples”.
few example
.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages of owning home.
Firstly
,
that is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
safety and security to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Therefore
, they can focus on other significant roles, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
time to their family. Study conducted, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
United kingdom
, employees are focusing on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
home during their life.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
home by tacking loan, which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
burden and
Possible spelling mistake found.
strees
on owner.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are stuck
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
when they are not able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
instalment and
then they are not focusing on their future.

To put it in the nutshell, owning home without any
Possible spelling mistake found.
burdun
has
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
positive and
it has
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take loan.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
it is
Consider using either the past participle “depended” or the present participle “depending” here.
depend
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
. I believe it has both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
.
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IELTS essay In some countries, owning a home rather than ranting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
168 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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