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In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? 32JN
In the modern world, the tendency to cut down on meat has seen a long-term gradual increase. While some claim that a vegetarian diet has a variety of benefits, others argue that this can adversely affect humans' health. The following essay will examine both these statements, and I will also explain why I believe the negative aspects of this movement outweigh the positive ones. To begin with, one predominant nuance which contributes to the beneficial points of a vegetarian diet is that it is low in fat. To put it differently, as normal daily meat of those people mainly consists of fruits and legumes, it drastically reduces the amount of fat in their body. To illustrate this, such products like eggs or beef have a high level of fat, and their inadequate consumption can occur a stroke, so a plant-based diet can potentially help to avoid this. However, as for me, the same advantage can be obtained by following an omnivorous plan, and it is required to regulate it by adding more healthy nutrients and elements. On the other hand, when it comes to a plant-based diet, many scientists link it with a B12 deficiency, which can entail significant damage to humans' well-being. In other words, the main sources of this micro-element are eggs and different types of meat, so by removing completely this food from a daily plan, a person will increase the risk of a multitude of diseases. As a case in point, this element insulates our body and protects it from negative external factors, as well as aids the functioning of the nervous system. As a result, products, which are enriched in B12 vitamin, must be an essential part of daily intake, but it is hard to follow this rule by rejecting meat. In conclusion, we are all too familiar with the social dilemma is whether it is healthier to accept a vegetarian diet. While some people state that it helps to regulate fat consumption, I strongly believe that adverse effects outweigh its benefits, and an omnivorous diet can potentially maintain our body health by providing a wide variety of essential nutrients and vitamins.
In the modern world, the tendency to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down on meat has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a long-term gradual increase. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
claim that a vegetarian diet has a variety of benefits, others argue that this can
adversely
affect humans' health. The following essay will examine both these statements, and I will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why I believe the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects of this movement outweigh the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
ones.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one predominant nuance which contributes to the beneficial points of a vegetarian diet is that it is low in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fat
. To put it
differently
, as normal daily meat of those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
mainly
consists of fruits and legumes, it
drastically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fat
in their body.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
To
illustrate this, such products like eggs or beef have a high level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fat
, and their inadequate consumption can occur a stroke,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
a plant-based diet can
potentially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to avoid this.
However
, as for me, the same advantage can
be obtained
by following an omnivorous plan, and it
is required
to regulate it by adding more healthy nutrients and elements.

On the other hand
, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to a plant-based diet,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
scientists link it with a B12 deficiency, which can entail significant damage to humans' well-being.
In other words
, the main sources of this micro-element are eggs and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of meat,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
by removing completely this food from a daily plan, a person will increase the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of a multitude of diseases. As a case in point, this element insulates our body and protects it from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
external factors,
as well
as aids the functioning of the nervous system.
As a result
, products, which
are enriched
in B12 vitamin,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be an essential part of daily intake,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to follow this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
by rejecting meat.

In conclusion
, we are all too familiar with the social dilemma is whether it is healthier to accept a vegetarian diet. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
state that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to regulate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fat
consumption, I
strongly
believe that adverse effects outweigh its benefits, and an omnivorous diet can
potentially
maintain our body health by providing a wide variety of essential nutrients and vitamins.
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IELTS essay In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
357 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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