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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Improving schools is the most important factor in the successful development of a country.

Improving schools is the most important factor in the successful development of a country. 82Pr
Improving schools has a significant impact on the flourishing of the talents of students, as well as on the growth and development of a country. Some people believe that improving schools is the most important factor in the successful development of a country but others think otherwise. I agree with the first group because of two main reasons which I will explore below. First, in this day and age of competition and development, all countries should compete with each other. To gain success to this competitor, they must have up-to-date knowledge and high technology in each field of science. Education has been an integral part of society. By means that, the government should pay more attention to the schools, where people learn a lot of things and increase their own level of literacy. By improving education opportunities, we are witnessing progress in peoples job opportunities, and following that the quality of life is growing. These are the most important factor in the development of a country. Therefore, able to compete with other high technology countries is the result of having well and improved schools. Second, schools have an important effect on the culture of the country. Culture includes the rule of life, traditions, and beliefs. The development of a country is based on the culture of the region. Factors that can themselves form the basis of development. And if its negligence, that causes obstacles to the continuous and dynamic development of the country. The economy itself is part of the culture and an aspect of social and cultural development. There is no doubt that education has a decisive effect on economic productivity. So, by improving the schools we can create the right culture in the country, which will also to the development of the country. By educating and training the students, who are the future makers of the country, to create the right culture in the country, which will also lead to the progress of the country. In conclusion, pay more attention to the growth of schools is a more important effect on the development of the country. This is because not only will provide a large number of qualified people with advanced knowledge’s and skills in a wide range of subjects, but also it will make the right culture in the country.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
has a significant impact on the flourishing of the talents of students,
as well
as on the growth and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
is the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
factor in the successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
otherwise
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
first
group
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of two main reasons which I will explore below.

First
, in this day and age of competition and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
, all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should compete with each other. To gain success to this competitor, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have up-to-date knowledge and high technology in each field of science. Education has been an integral part of society. By means that, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should pay more attention to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things and increase their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
level of literacy. By
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improving
education opportunities, we are witnessing progress in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
job opportunities, and following that the quality of life is growing. These are the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
factor in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Therefore
, able to compete with other high technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is the result of having well and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
schools.

Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
have an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
effect on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Culture
includes the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
of life, traditions, and beliefs. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is based
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of the region. Factors that can themselves form the basis of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
. And if its negligence, that causes obstacles to the continuous and dynamic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. The economy itself is part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and an aspect of social and cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
. There is no doubt that education has a decisive effect on economic productivity.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improving
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
we can create the right
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, which will
also
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. By educating and training the students, who are the future makers of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, to create the right
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, which will
also
lead to the progress of the country.

In conclusion
, pay more attention to the growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
is a more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
effect on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
will provide
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
qualified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with advanced knowledge’s and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in a wide range of subjects,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the right
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
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IELTS essay Improving schools is the most important factor in the successful development of a country.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
383 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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