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sucess is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person

sucess is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person gLkL
A popular belief is that people often think money and commodities are parameters for measuring a person's success. In my opinion, wealth is not the only aspect of measuring success, and numerous factors contribute to the success of a person. In this essay, I will examine some of the factors that contribute to a person's success. Parameters for measuring the success might be different for different people. While I believe achieving things you dream of in your entire life also bring success in life. Moreover, living a respectable life with your family and friends is also associated with success. For example, in different countries like Pakistan and India, people inspire a person who achieves all his life targets like a good job and a caring family. To sum up, having a job a person loves to do and a devoted family are also considered vital parameters in defining success. Compelling moral character and outstanding education would make an individual successful in the future. Up-to-date education assists young people to compete in the modern world with their counterparts. Furthermore, a good upbringing helps them in socializing and in raising the right family. All these factors facilitate bringing success and fortune to a person's life. For instance, a world-renowned cricketer Mathew Hussey has an education in engineering. Moreover, he exhibits excellent character. All of these things made him more successful than his fellows. In conclusion, wealth is certainly not the only parameter to identify a person's success. Several factors contribute to individual success. For instance, a passionate career and a loving family are a few of them.
A popular belief is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
money and commodities are parameters for measuring a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. In my opinion, wealth is not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
aspect of measuring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
, and numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
contribute to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
of a person. In this essay, I will examine
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
that contribute to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person's
success.

Parameters for measuring the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
might be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
I believe achieving things you dream of in your entire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
also
bring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Moreover
, living a respectable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
with your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and friends is
also
associated with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
For example
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries like Pakistan and India,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
inspire a person who achieves all his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
targets like a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
job and a caring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. To sum up, having a job a person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loves
to do and a devoted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
are
also
considered vital parameters in defining success.

Compelling moral character and outstanding education would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an individual successful in the future. Up-to-date education assists young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to compete in the modern world with their counterparts.
Furthermore
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
upbringing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them in socializing and in raising the right
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. All these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
facilitate bringing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
and fortune to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
For instance
, a world-renowned cricketer Mathew
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hussey
has an education in engineering.
Moreover
, he exhibits excellent character. All of these things made him more successful than his fellows.

In conclusion
, wealth is
certainly
not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
parameter to identify a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. Several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
contribute to individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
For instance
, a passionate career and a loving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
are a few of them.
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IELTS essay sucess is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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