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I think self-employed is better then work for a company because self-employed give you much freedom.

I think self-employed is better then work for a company because self-employed give you much freedom. But you need to be an skilled person to being a self-employed. Although self-employed is not too easy like work for company but by this way you can easy huge amount of money and can do anything you want. Work for a company is restricted salary, time restricted and the main thing is life will be restricted. So I like self-employed rather than working for a company.
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
self-employed is
Did you mean “better than”?
better then
work for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
self-employed give you much freedom.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
you need to be
Use “a” instead of ‘an’ if the following word doesn’t start with a vowel sound, e.g. ‘a sentence’, ‘a university’.
an
skilled person to being
Probably a noun is missing in this part of the sentence.
a self-employed
. Although self-employed is not too easy like work for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by this way you can easy huge amount of money and can do anything you want. Work for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
is restricted
salary, time restricted and the main thing is life will
be restricted
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I like self-employed
rather
than working for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
.

IELTS essay I think self-employed is better then work for a company because self-employed give you much freedom.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
83 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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