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How instant noodles are made ?

How instant noodles are made ? GMKAg
To make instant noodles, they almost don't need people. After they mix flour, water, and oil, all process is continued on a conveyor. So, they can cut labor costs and provide good noodles at a low price. During the process of making instant noodles, a lot of oil are used. You should not eat instant noodles too much. Eating too much instant noodles may cause some illness, such as a lifestyle-elated disease and high blood pressure and so on.
To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noodles
, they almost don't need
Did you mean "to people"?
people
. After they mix flour, water, and oil, all process
is continued
on a conveyor.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
labor costs and provide
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noodles
at a low price.

During the process of making instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noodles
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
oil are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
. You should not eat instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noodles
too much. Eating too much instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noodles
may cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
illness, such as a lifestyle-elated disease and high blood pressure and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.

IELTS essay How instant noodles are made ?

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
79 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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