Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

How do you think we can improve the quality of primary education in a country ?

How do you think we can improve the quality of primary education in a country? 7aPd2
In the last few decades, education always played a significant role in the world and It has been the most important element that caused development in the humankind society. Students studying today would determine tomorrow, in the other word, children constructing in their primary level of school may change the future. Hence, the quality of tutoring should be dramatically improved in order to develop the country in the right way. Firstly, and most importantly, the students should be well-taught by the primary agents of the life known as parents. Next is a college and school that play the secondary role for a student to grow whether mentally, emotionally or healthy. As a result, the educational system should grow to see a student growth. In order to do that teaching quality must be increased as highly trained tutors can take a duty to teach and help young students and encourage them towards further education in which the salary of tutors must increases and paid on time to have the passion and love to teach. In addition, the tuition fees should decrease as many poor families do not have that economic power to send their children to study where the child might be faced against a wide range of difficulties that cannot overcome them and can lead to crime. On the other hand, if we look at the story of successful humans, we can observe that a large number of the them were born in a poor family. Therefore, we can realize many talents are not visible as many intelligent poor kids can not study and they should waste their life. Usage of the internet and technology is another way to improve the quality of education. Nowadays, in developed country, many students use the internet to achieve more information on the fields they are studying and they have access to many reliable sources that can help their knowledge. Also, many tutorial videos and articles can be provided by highly graduated professors to be seen by students did not understand that topic very well. By this way students can access to the best professors all around the world in addition to their own teacher. To sum up, in order to improve the quality of education parents play an important role to train their children in the childhood and prepare them for education where school take responsibility in the second part for growth and in order to have better improvement in school well-trained teachers must be provided for students, then tuition fees must be decreased and finally for the better understanding internet and technology must be used.
In the last few decades,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
always played a significant role in the world and It has been the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
element that caused development in the humankind society.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
studying
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
would determine tomorrow, in the other word, children constructing in their primary level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the future.
Hence
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of tutoring should be
dramatically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
to develop the country in the right way.

Firstly
, and most
importantly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should be well-taught by the primary agents of the life known as parents.
Next
is a college and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
that play the secondary role for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to grow whether mentally,
emotionally
or healthy.
As a result
, the educational system should grow to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
growth. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
to do that teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be increased
as
highly
trained tutors can take a duty to teach and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and encourage them towards
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in which the salary of tutors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
increases and paid on time to have the passion and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to teach.

In addition
, the tuition fees should decrease as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
poor families do not have that economic power to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their children to study where the child might
be faced
against a wide range of difficulties that cannot overcome them and can lead to crime.
On the other hand
, if we look at the story of successful humans, we can observe that
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "them"?
the them
were born
in a poor family.
Therefore
, we can realize
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
talents are not visible as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
intelligent poor kids can not
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
study and
they should waste their life.

Usage of the internet and technology is another way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. Nowadays, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed country
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the internet to achieve more information on the fields they are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
studying and
they have access to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reliable sources that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their knowledge.
Also
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
tutorial videos and articles can
be provided
by
highly
graduated professors to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
did not understand that topic
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well. By this way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can access to the best professors all around the world
in addition
to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
teacher.

To sum up, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
parents play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role to train their children in the childhood and prepare them for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
take responsibility in the second part for growth and in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
order
to have better improvement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
well-trained teachers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be provided
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, then tuition fees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be decreased
and
finally
for the better understanding internet and technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay How do you think we can improve the quality of primary education in a country?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
433 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • How do you think we can improve the quality of primary education in a country ?