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Government should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Government should spend money on railways rather than roads. with this statement? rBQk
The authorities of our nation ought to invest tremendous amount of finance in the railway system more than the land transport. I completly agree with this oppinion because of the manifold benefits in the social and enviornmental fields. First of all, it is exetremely good way to promote and invest funds for a improved rail way system. What i intend to say that, it place a significant role in the stumbling rock of accidental death rates in the terittory, as a consequence of harsh driving and violation of traffic legislation, which was encountered a problem from the land transportation. A good illustration for this is, provide a better experience and gave awareness about the pitfall areas of the road transport. Consequently, people they ensure their safe journey in the daily life. For instance, a seminar plan to exicute in the college areas, whic was mainly concentrated in the adequate strategies to combat the problem by choosing rail system. On the other hand, pursue a positive movement in railway system, to put it another way, road journey place a paramount role in the enviornemental pollution. Which was caused by the large amount of vechicles run on the streets. Neverthless, promoting railway as a first priority it will eradicate and suddenly slumt or mitigate the enviornmental polllution that caused by the high scale of vechicles in the country by emmit fuel gases from the for wheel vechicles. A good illustration for this is, if the most of the people choose railway for travel, subsequently, a infer in the utilization of their own vechicles or private one. As a result, this will lead to reduction of environmental pollution, which was caused by the vechicles. In conclusion, it was a good positive movement for the public and enviornment by providng more economy to the improvement of railway system. This will eradicate all the detrimental part of the road system. As well as, it advances a healthy enviornment for future.
The authorities of our nation ought to invest tremendous amount of finance in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
more than the land transport. I
Possible spelling mistake found.
completly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
Possible spelling mistake found.
oppinion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the manifold benefits in the social and
Possible spelling mistake found.
enviornmental
fields.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
exetremely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
way to promote and invest funds for
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
rail way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
. What
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
intend to say that, it
Did you mean "places"?
place
a significant role in the stumbling rock of accidental death rates in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
terittory
, as a consequence of harsh driving and violation of traffic legislation, which
was encountered
a problem from the land transportation. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
illustration for this is, provide a better experience and gave awareness about the pitfall areas of the road transport.
Consequently
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
they ensure their safe journey in the daily life.
For instance
, a seminar plan to
Possible spelling mistake found.
exicute
in the college areas,
Possible spelling mistake found.
whic
was
mainly
concentrated in the adequate strategies to combat the problem by choosing rail system.

On the other hand
, pursue a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
movement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
, to put it another way, road journey place a paramount role in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
enviornemental
pollution.
“Which” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Which
was caused
by the large amount of
Possible spelling mistake found.
vechicles
run on the streets.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Neverthless
, promoting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
as a
first
priority it will eradicate and
suddenly
Possible spelling mistake found.
slumt
or mitigate the
Possible spelling mistake found.
enviornmental
Possible spelling mistake found.
polllution
that caused by the high scale of
Possible spelling mistake found.
vechicles
in the country by
Possible spelling mistake found.
emmit
fuel gases from the for wheel
Possible spelling mistake found.
vechicles
. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
illustration for this is, if the most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
for travel,
subsequently
,
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
infer in the utilization of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Possible spelling mistake found.
vechicles
or private one.
As a result
, this will lead to reduction of environmental pollution, which
was caused
by the
Possible spelling mistake found.
vechicles
.

In conclusion
, it was a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
movement for the public and
Possible spelling mistake found.
enviornment
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
providng
more economy to the improvement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
. This will eradicate all the detrimental part of the road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
.
As well
as, it advances a healthy
Possible spelling mistake found.
enviornment
for future.
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IELTS essay Government should spend money on railways rather than roads. with this statement?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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