Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Girls choose arts boys choose science why? Is this should be changed?

Girls choose arts boys choose science why? Is this should be changed? LwOK8
In tertiary education, female students choose humanities while male learners choose science and other difficult subjects. They choose subjects according to their gender because of social pressure, it should be changed because this will help the society in getting skilled professionals. Firstly, society pressurizes children and teaches them girls are for household chores and boys are the real bread earners. Because males have to earn their livelihood so they should choose technical subjects. This will help them to get the highest paid jobs; nonetheless, girls have to take care of home and children; hence, they should choose arts. In arts, subjects that are taught are easy and related to home life. When the young minds are continuously taught that their subjects should be according to their gender, they start following the advice of their elders and choose subjects accordingly. For instance, most girls take home science in their secondary class, although they do not have interest in cooking. Secondly, this should be changed because this will help to get more professionals who excel in their fields. If students choose subjects in social pressure, they do not get success. Subjects should be choosed according to their interest. Some girls have intellectual skills, if they choose science, they will become great scientists and serve the world with their inventions. Such great minds should not be gender-biased. For instance, Kiran Devi is a well-respected civil servant, nevertheless, Sanjeev Kapoor being a male is a famous chef because they choose their professions according to their interests not what suits their gender. In conclusion, social pressure is a major cause behind girls choosing arts and boys studying science. I personally believe this should be changed because the world will get more successful professionals if they choose subjects according to their interests.
In tertiary education, female students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
humanities while male learners
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and other difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
according
to their gender
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of social pressure, it should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the society in getting skilled professionals.

Firstly
, society pressurizes children and teaches them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
are for household chores and boys are the real bread earners.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
males
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
earn their livelihood
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
technical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. This will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the highest paid jobs; nonetheless,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take care of home and children;
hence
, they should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
arts. In arts,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that
are taught
are easy and related to home life. When the young minds are
continuously
taught that their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
according
to their gender, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
following the advice of their elders and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
accordingly
.
For instance
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
take home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
in their secondary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, although they do not have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in cooking.

Secondly
, this should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more professionals who excel in their fields. If students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
in social pressure, they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
success.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Subjects
should be
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "chose", the past tense form of the verb 'choose'?
choosed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
according
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
have intellectual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, if they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
, they will become great scientists and serve the world with their inventions. Such great minds should not be gender-biased.
For instance
, Kiran Devi is a well-respected civil servant,
nevertheless
, Sanjeev
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kapoor
being a male is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
chef
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
their professions
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
according
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interests
not what suits their gender.

In conclusion
, social pressure is a major cause behind
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
choosing arts and boys studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
. I
personally
believe this should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the world will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more successful professionals if they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
according
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interests
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Girls choose arts boys choose science why? Is this should be changed?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 5band
    food and the various elements that makes it up
    iuguuuuggyuhijokpohuvbhjnkmlmkbfjh kjb eijfgugpug[ g[ddddddddiiiiiiiii dvbmlvohguvuhf scnbhjkh uijhb bv bnjn njn vnkn vn v n v n vjksjbchugiudg uuuiuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu9pdty9tgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggdssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss...
  • 5band
    Children’s education is expensive. In some countries, the government pay some of or all of the costs. Is it a positive or negative development?
    It is a fact that some countries have paid full or partial fees at school for children. This development has introduced both positive and negative aspects because of the benefits and drawbacks which have been brought to human life. It is clear that paying for children’s education would bring about ...
  • 5.5band
    Media Manipulation: freedom of expression at broadcasting In Saudi Arabia due to strict regulations
    The subject of manipulation has a mani explanation, but when it comes to media, it has only one meaning which is manipulation with words. Strict regulations and policies make hiding some information easier, whereas people on the news cannot tell the whole full truth, and that's a huge problem. Hidin...
  • 6band
    Ait polution has been rising. Problem and solutions essay.
    A generation ago humanity resided in more unspoiled atmosphere and felt deep satisfaction with the pure quality of water supplies compared to the contemporary era. However, industrial revolution in developing countries altered the attitude towards the nature. This essay will look at the core reasons...
  • 6band
    Compare between vegan vs non-vegan diets
    When comparing vegan and non-vegan diets, we can see that there are significant differences between them. A vegan diet is a vegetarian eating style, but it is completely devoid of animal products, including meat, eggs, and dairy products. Non-vegan one, on the other hand, consists of chicken, meat, ...
  • 5.5band
    Education via lecture and online mode
    As per the topic, it is said that the advancement of technology has decreased the importance of lectures as a way of teaching. I completely disagree with the fact because even though there is a lot of technological advancement, going to college and listening to lectures will always be useful and ...