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For school children, their teachers have more influence on their intelligence and social development than their parents. To what extend do you agree or disagree? v.7

For school children, their teachers have more influence on their intelligence and social development than their parents. v. 7
It is argued by some people that the intelligence and the social development of children in school is mainly influenced by their teachers. I disagree with this notion, as social skills and intellect of young ones begin to develop before they commence elementary school and parents spend more time with their children to influence their developments. First of all, intelligence and social skills of young ones begin to develop from infancy. Children neurological abilities determine their intellects and social developments which can be affected by their nutrition and care parents give to them at the early age. For instance, infants who are well nourished with adequate parental bonding are expected to be intelligent and have skills needed for social interactions, although, they need some inputs from their teachers as well. Therefore, if parents do not provide the necessary care for their kids, school teachers would not be able to instruct them. Furthermore, children spend more time with their parents than the teachers and they can be easily influenced by them. Children's interactions with their parents begin right after birth and even when children start schooling, they spend a smaller proportion of their time with teachers. For example, in Nigeria, primary school pupils spend an average of seven hours daily at school, while they stay with their parents for more than half of the day. Thus, parents have more opportunities to impact on the intelligience and social developments of their offsprings compared to their teachers. In conclusion, I disagree with the view that teachers have more influence on school children's intelligence and social development than their parents. This is due to the fact that children's intellect and social interactions start before commencing school and they spend a considerable proportion of time daily with their parents.
It
is argued
by
some
people
that the intelligence and the
social
development
of
children
in
school
is
mainly
influenced by their
teachers
. I disagree with this notion, as
social
skills
and intellect of young
ones
begin
to develop
before
they commence elementary
school
and
parents
spend
more
time
with their
children
to influence their developments.

First of all
, intelligence and
social
skills
of young
ones
begin
to develop from infancy.
Children
neurological abilities determine their intellects and
social
developments
which can be
affected
by their nutrition and care
parents
give to them at the early age.
For instance
, infants who are well nourished with adequate parental bonding are
expected
to be intelligent and have
skills
needed for
social
interactions, although, they need
some
inputs from their
teachers
as well
.
Therefore
, if
parents
do not provide the necessary care for their kids,
school
teachers
would not be able to instruct them.

Furthermore
,
children
spend
more
time
with their
parents
than the
teachers and
they can be
easily
influenced by them. Children's interactions with their
parents
begin
right after birth and even when
children
start
schooling, they
spend
a smaller proportion of their
time
with
teachers
.
For example
, in Nigeria, primary
school
pupils
spend
an average of seven hours daily at
school
, while they stay with their
parents
for more than half of the day.
Thus
,
parents
have more opportunities to impact on the
intelligience
and
social
developments
of their
offsprings
compared to their teachers.

In conclusion
, I disagree with the view that
teachers
have more influence on
school
children's intelligence and
social
development
than their
parents
.
This is due to the fact that
children's intellect and
social
interactions
start
before
commencing
school and
they
spend
a considerable proportion of
time
daily with their
parents
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay For school children, their teachers have more influence on their intelligence and social development than their parents. v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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