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Essay Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on young children. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Essay Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on young children. v. 1
In the contemporary era, a computer is one of the biggest inventions which has changed the world. Devices are part and parcel in daily routine because these are essential nowadays to work more efficiently. The question is the usage of the computer is beneficial, or it has detrimental effects on Grownup. According to me, it has several advantages which will be discussed in the forthcoming paragraph. To commence with, these days, learners are surfing on the computer for their studies. They consume considerable time for browsing to complete assignments. Also, it helps to become well acquainted with the latest developments, which are more imperative in the competition period. Schools, for instance, delivering a high quality of education because technology’s revolution is on peek. Hence, Pupils are utilizing their crucial time for smart studies by applying computer software. Furthermore, it is a useful tool for young-adults who cannot carry a school bag. For example, enormous Kindergartens are using the techniques to vanish the intricate education system which carries the heavy school beg that usually full of books. This is a vital move of modernization, which compelled institutes to adopt the new resources. Now, a sheer number of students are getting interested in, to opt improved schooling patterns. On the other hand, a popular indoor activity to play video games have repercussions on the eye side. Youngsters spend massive time on computers and laptops; unfortunately, they become addicted and do not focus on their academic syllabus. Resultant, get lower ranks which leads to insuperable losses in future studies. To recapitulate, the computer has numerous benefits, but it should be used more efficaciously; otherwise, once such a situation arises, it has its own repercussions. I would suggest that parents and teachers must foster cooperation with children and should produce an utterance about the positive utilization.
In the contemporary era, a computer is one of the biggest inventions which has
changed
the world. Devices are part and parcel in daily routine
because
these are essential nowadays to work more
efficiently
. The question is the usage of the computer is beneficial, or it has detrimental effects on Grownup.
According to me
, it has several advantages which will
be discussed
in the forthcoming paragraph.

To commence with, these days, learners are surfing on the computer for their studies. They consume considerable time for browsing to complete assignments.
Also
, it
helps
to become well acquainted with the latest developments, which are more imperative in the competition period. Schools,
for instance
, delivering a high quality of education
because
technology’s revolution is on peek.
Hence
, Pupils are utilizing their crucial time for smart studies by applying computer software.

Furthermore
, it is a useful tool for young-adults who cannot carry a school bag.
For example
, enormous Kindergartens are using the techniques to vanish the intricate education system which carries the heavy school
beg
that
usually
full of books. This is a vital
move
of modernization, which compelled institutes to adopt the new resources.
Now
, a sheer number of students are getting interested in, to opt
improved
schooling patterns.

On the other hand
, a popular indoor activity to play video games have repercussions on the eye side. Youngsters spend massive time on computers and laptops; unfortunately, they become addicted and do not focus on their academic syllabus. Resultant,
get
lower ranks which leads to insuperable losses in future studies.

To recapitulate, the computer has numerous benefits,
but
it should be
used
more
efficaciously
;
otherwise
, once such a situation arises, it has its
own
repercussions. I would suggest that parents and teachers
must
foster cooperation with children and should produce an utterance about the
positive
utilization.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Essay Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on young children. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
302 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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