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Despite an improvement in vehicle technology. There are still large number of road accidents. Explain some causes for these accidents and what according to you need to be done to solve it?

Despite an improvement in vehicle technology. There are still large number of road accidents. Explain some causes for these accidents and what according to you need to be done to solve it? 22K6
In these days, numerous of road mishaps are occur, although a development in transportation technology. And, there are different reasons and combine steps from government and individuals to solve it. Among distinct causes of road accidents, use of mobile phone while driving is the primary one. For example, some people use cell phone when they are driving the vehicle. Due to this, they donot concentrate their way of driving and then mishappings take place. Apart from this, lack of driving skills is major reason of this. As under 18 years, children can drive the transportation and they donot learn about traffic rules and driving skills properly. They drive itself without any guidance. As a result, some problems are occur and they cannot solve. Therefore, many mishaps are happen. Despite above mentioned reasons, road accident there are different steps to control this. Major one is government should impose heavy fines those who use cell phone when driving. As a result, next time the person think twice before picking up the call during driving. Secondly, government should be aware about traffic rules and driving skills to individuals. They can trained properly to each person and after testing allow to only those people for applying the license, who are passed in test. Due to this, some problems are solved when everyone uses the law and regulations. In conclusion, although there are mobile phone and under age driving are main reason, it can be resolved by taking steps from government and individuals.
In these days, numerous of road mishaps are
Consider using a past participle here: "occurred".
occur
, although a development in transportation technology. And, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
and combine steps from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and individuals to solve it. Among distinct causes of road accidents,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
is the primary one.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
when they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
the vehicle. Due to this, they
Possible spelling mistake found.
donot
concentrate their way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
and then
Possible spelling mistake found.
mishappings
take place. Apart from this, lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
is major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
of this. As under 18 years, children can drive the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
transportation and
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
donot
learn about traffic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
properly
. They drive itself without any guidance.
As a result
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
occur and
they cannot solve.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
mishaps are
Consider using a past participle here: "happened".
happen
. Despite above mentioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
, road accident there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
steps to control this. Major one is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should impose heavy fines those who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
.
As a result
,
next
time the person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
twice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
picking up the call during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should be aware about traffic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to individuals. They can
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "train"
trained
properly
to each person and after testing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
for applying the license, who
are passed
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
. Due to this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems
are solved
when everyone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
the law and regulations.
In conclusion
, although there are mobile
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "phones"?
phone
and under age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
are main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
, it can
be resolved
by taking steps from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and individuals.
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IELTS essay Despite an improvement in vehicle technology. There are still large number of road accidents. Explain some causes for these accidents and what according to you need to be done to solve it?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
248 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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