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Culture is much the samealla around the world she compared to previous time . Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Culture is much the samealla around the world she compared to previous time. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? 2erJ
In this era, some people believe that civilization has been much the similar all around the world. It compared with to ancient time. Meanwhile, many individuals say that it is a lot of difference between in recent cultural and in previous time. Consequently, it is a positive economic growth and development. I will discuss both sides in the succeeding paragraphs. One the one hand, culture is almost same all around the world in recent and past time. There are no change about the different things. First and foremost, in previous time most of the people do the rituals has been celebrated together and they are do the lot of entertainment. While, when in recent time there are no huge change about rituals. For instance, the fashion clothes and footwear almost same prices in previous time and in recent time because economic progress trend is also increase in the whole world than due to culture has been steady depicts the new teend and favorable fashion. As a result, individuals can get easily information about the different culture and new fashions. One the other hand, some people think that many individuals visit to the foreign countries get their information about the new culture and language. Moreover, there are lots of jobs opportunities are available in recent time and due to educated people can easily get job. They do not change in language in previous time and recent time. People can easily talk to other language. At the end, according to me, culture is almost same in previous time and recent time. There are not change in cultural.
In this era,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that civilization has been much the similar all around the world. It compared with to ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. Meanwhile,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals say that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
difference between in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recent
cultural and in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
Consequently
, it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
economic growth and development. I will discuss both sides in the succeeding paragraphs.
Did you mean "on"?
One
the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is almost same all around the world in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recent
and past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. There are no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
about the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
things.
First
and foremost, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do the rituals has
been celebrated
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
together and
they are
Consider using a past participle here: "done".
do
the lot of entertainment. While, when in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
there are no huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
about rituals.
For instance
, the fashion clothes and footwear almost same prices in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
economic progress trend is
also
increase in the whole
Use "(world)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
world
than due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
has been steady depicts the new
Possible spelling mistake found.
teend
and favorable fashion.
As a result
, individuals can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
easily
information about the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and new fashions.
Did you mean "on"?
One
the other hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals visit to the foreign countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their information about the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and language.
Moreover
, there are lots of jobs opportunities are available in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and due to educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
job. They do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
in language in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can
easily
talk to other language. At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, according to me,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is almost same in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. There are not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
in cultural.
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IELTS essay Culture is much the samealla around the world she compared to previous time. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
265 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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