Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Computer games are very popular for all ages and nationalities. Parents think this has little educational value and it will be harmful for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Computer games are very popular for all ages and nationalities. Parents think this has little educational value and it will be harmful for children. wpjr
Computerized games, such as Play Station, have become increasingly popular among all ages worldwide. Parents believe that there are no benefits from playing computer games, and it is just a wasting time, and there is potential to encourage violence. This essay will discuss the disadvantages of electronic games, including spending a massive time on these games that could be utilized to learn useful things and instill some evil ideas that can affect them. In my opinion, the parents' concern is entirely justified. On the one hand, people, especially kids and teenagers, are consuming a colossal time playing electronic games, consequently affecting their educational level. Some children are escaping from their schools and visiting shops that offer computer games. These conspicuous trends lead to destroying the future of these pupils. The BBC News has reported that around 30 per cent of students are leaving their schools to practice these games. This often results in less-educated people because of playing video games. On the other hand, some companies produce computer games involving and imposing their thoughts that could be not suitable for their age or culture. Furthermore, some video games contain only violence which leads to an increase in crimes among youngsters. The BBC News has conducted a survey for a reason of spreading the violence between teenagers and found that video games become the first cause of this phenomenon. Therefore, computerized games should be monitored before offered to children. In conclusion, parents should pay attention to their children while they are playing computerized games and try to offer them computer games-based- learning to gain some useful information and entertain them. In my opinion, parents should offer alternative games to their kinds and monitor them closely while they are playing their favourites game.
Computerized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, such as
This word is normally spelled as one.
Play Station
, have become
increasingly
popular among all ages worldwide. Parents believe that there are no benefits from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, and it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a wasting time, and there is potential to encourage violence. This essay will discuss the disadvantages of electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, including spending a massive time on these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
that could
be utilized
to learn useful things and instill
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
evil
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
that can affect them. In my opinion, the parents' concern is
entirely
justified.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
especially
kids and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
, are consuming a colossal time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
,
consequently
affecting their educational level.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
children are escaping from their schools and visiting shops that offer computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. These conspicuous trends lead to destroying the future of these pupils. The BBC News has reported that around 30 per cent of students
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "is"? (Some collective nouns can be treated as both singular and plural, so 'are' is not always incorrect.)
are
leaving their schools to practice these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. This
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
results in less-educated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
video games.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
produce computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
involving and imposing their thoughts that could be not suitable for their age or culture.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
contain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
violence which leads to an increase in crimes among youngsters. The BBC News has conducted a survey for a reason of spreading the violence between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
and found that video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
become the
first
cause of this phenomenon.
Therefore
, computerized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
should
be monitored
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
offered to children.

In conclusion
, parents should pay attention to their children while they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
computerized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and try to offer them computer games-based- learning to gain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
useful information and entertain them. In my opinion, parents should offer alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
to their kinds and monitor them
closely
while they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourites' is British English.
favourites
game.

IELTS essay Computer games are very popular for all ages and nationalities. Parents think this has little educational value and it will be harmful for children.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Computer games are very popular for all ages and nationalities. Parents think this has little educational value and it will be harmful for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?