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Childhood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia. As many as two thirds of children are now obese. Schools have a responsibility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Childhood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia. As many as two thirds of children are now obese. Schools have a responsibility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do. egDx
Child obesity has become a cause of concern in Australia. Almost, two third of them are now obese. This essay will discuss why I completely disagree that schools should take measures to what their pupils eat. Firstly, one of the disagreements is that educational centers are for studying not for eating and exercises. Teachers are expected to teach and educate their pupils on new skills that will be useful when they graduate. More so, foods are cooked by the parents with following proper hygiene that will not cause health panic. This, will not have an effect on the body system. For instance, my children wake up as early as 5: 00 am on a daily basis to have some indoor and outdoor exercises before preparing for school. On the other hand, the hours spent in schools are more than the time spent at home. Most Australian children have become so brilliant and intelligent that the educational body won a state award for the best ministry in the country. For example, my four year old son can now read, write and speak fluently. This is a product of good teaching in a classroom also, the learning of basic technical things can be useful in future. In conclusion, it was itemized that schools are for learning different type of subjects. While, a home is for monitoring what a child eats and all workouts that is required to be done. In my opinion, I absolutely disagree that schools should have control of a child's diet.
Child obesity has become a cause of concern in Australia. Almost, two third of them are
now
obese. This essay will discuss why I completely disagree that
schools
should take measures to what their pupils eat.

Firstly
, one of the disagreements is that educational centers are for studying not for eating and exercises. Teachers are
expected
to teach and educate their pupils on new
skills
that will be useful when they graduate. More
so
, foods
are cooked
by the parents with following proper hygiene that will not cause health panic. This, will not have an effect on the body system.
For instance
, my children wake up as early as 5: 00 am on a daily basis to have
some
indoor and outdoor exercises
before
preparing for school.

On the other hand
, the hours spent in
schools
are more than the time spent at home. Most Australian children have become
so
brilliant and intelligent that the educational body won a state award for the best ministry in the country.
For example
, my four year
old
son can
now
read, write and speak
fluently
. This is a product of
good
teaching in a classroom
also
, the learning of basic technical things can be useful
in future
.

In conclusion
, it
was itemized
that
schools
are for learning
different
type of subjects. While, a home is for monitoring what a child eats and all workouts that
is required
to
be done
. In my opinion, I
absolutely
disagree that
schools
should have control of a child's diet.
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IELTS essay Childhood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia. As many as two thirds of children are now obese. Schools have a responsibility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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