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An older person you know and respect

An older person you know and respect aJpwV
I know many older person in my life and I really respect all of them due to their excellent experience from their life and we can know very much from their experience and we can learn many moral values and which is really helpful in life so here I would like to talk about my favourite teacher her name is Renu wala she is really older person which I know then I took admission in first year of the bachelor degree that I my feels a lot of difficulties to understand the eulogy concept clearly but after that one of my another teacher suggested to me to coaching from Renu wala her how is really close to my house and I can easily go there and took coaching from her her behaviour of teaching is really simple and with with excellent guidance I can score well in zoology and I can asansol am I and other difficulties and I also can share all my difficulties and problem without any e nervousness she is really like to my mother and her behaviour of caring and the talking is really like to my mother so I really love to her and I always respect from my heart she always try to solve all the problems and I really respect of her due to many reason one of the most important reason is that she spend a polity of time with those children who have no parents and she also give some money to buy cloth and books for them and apart from there she are so give gives coaching free of cost and she always try to solve all type of problems in fact she is an older but her working and her honesty level show that she is now only at twenty years old and she is really a fit and fine and she have a that knowledge about it any difficult situation
I know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
older person in my life and I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
respect all of them due to their excellent experience from their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
life and
we can know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much from their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
experience and
we can learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
moral values and which is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
helpful in life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
here I would like to talk about my
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
teacher her name is
Possible spelling mistake found.
Renu
Possible spelling mistake found.
wala
she is
The extreme adjective for old is "ancient".
really older
person which I know then I took admission in
first
year of the bachelor degree that I my feels
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
difficulties to understand the eulogy concept
clearly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
after that one of my another teacher suggested to me to coaching from
Possible spelling mistake found.
Renu
Possible spelling mistake found.
wala
her how is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
close to my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
and I can
easily
go there and took coaching from
Possible typo: you repeated a word
her her
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of teaching is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
simple and
Possible typo: you repeated a word
with with
excellent guidance I can score well in zoology and I can
Possible spelling mistake found.
asansol
am I and other difficulties and I
also
can share all my difficulties and problem without any e nervousness she is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
like to my mother and her
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of caring and the talking is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
like to my mother
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to her and I always respect from my heart she always
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "tries", "tried".
try
to solve all the problems and I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
respect of her due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reason one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
Please check whether a plural form of 'reason' should be used.
reason
is that she spend a polity of time with those children who have no
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
parents and
she
also
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "gives", "gave".
give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
cloth and books for them and apart from there she
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "is", "was", "were".
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
give gives coaching free of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
cost and
she always
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "tries", "tried".
try
to solve all type of problems in fact she is an older
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
her working and her honesty level
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that she is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
at twenty years
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
old and
she is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
really
a fit and
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
fine and
she
The pronoun 'she' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "has", "had".
have
a that knowledge about it any difficult situation
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IELTS essay An older person you know and respect

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
321 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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