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Agrowing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health system to deal with the health problems. Some people believe that providing curriculum to deal with problems by providing lesson in curriculum.

An increasing number of overweight individuals is putting a strain on the health care system in order to mitigate these issue. Certain people argue that providing curriculum in school to deal with the problem. This essay agree that insert lessons in curriculum of school because this suggestion would be benefit people health in general, and it would have a positive impact on the shape of their body. There is some truth in the argument that providing section of health in curriculum can be helpful students to be more care about their health and they might be fit. However, I think the lessons would be about kind of healthy food and cardio exercies. This is because many food are cause of obesity, but exercies are also the cause. I think, unless people should know about this issue earlr in the school throght the lesson, individual might face heavy problems in the future. This means that, although exist asustance provide energy to the body, there is also a food which contain of alot of fat, which is the main cause of obesity. Moreover, Another reason why I believe that teaching about obesity in curriculum of school is that lake of walking. The majority of individuals are sedentary, for they watch tv for along hours. Thus, people becoming overweight. This is because they don't care about size of the problem, and it is effect. For instance, according to a recent report by the Guardian newspaper shown that in the USA there have been an increase in the amount of adolescent obesity, which was the result of many years. In conclusion, despite there are people who feel that curriculum don't need additional like heath section, I do not agree, as this would be a beneficial step and it could be a healthy community empty from disease.
An increasing number of overweight individuals is putting a strain on the
health
care system in order to mitigate these issue. Certain
people
argue that providing
curriculum
in
school
to deal with the problem. This essay
agree
that insert lessons in
curriculum
of
school
because
this suggestion would be benefit
people
health
in general
, and it would have a
positive
impact on the shape of their body.

There is
some
truth in the argument that providing section of
health
in
curriculum
can be helpful students to be more care about their
health and
they might
be fit
.
However
, I
think
the lessons would be about kind of healthy food and cardio
exercies
. This is
because
many
food are cause of obesity,
but
exercies
are
also
the cause. I
think
, unless
people
should know about this issue
earlr
in the
school
throght
the lesson, individual might face heavy problems in the future. This means that, although exist
asustance
provide energy to the body, there is
also
a food which contain of
alot
of
fat
, which is the main cause of obesity.
Moreover
, Another reason why I believe that teaching about obesity in
curriculum
of
school
is that lake of walking. The majority of individuals are sedentary, for they
watch
tv
for along hours.
Thus
,
people
becoming overweight. This is
because
they don't care about size of the problem, and it is effect.
For instance
, according to a recent report by the Guardian newspaper shown that in the USA there have been an increase in the amount of adolescent obesity, which was the result of
many
years.
In conclusion
, despite there are
people
who feel that
curriculum
don't need additional like heath section, I do not
agree
, as this would be a beneficial
step and
it could be a healthy community empty from disease.
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IELTS essay Agrowing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health system to deal with the health problems. Some people believe that providing curriculum to deal with problems by providing lesson in curriculum.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
302 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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