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Advertisement encourages consumers to buy in bulk, whereas it should promote high quality of the products sold. Do you agree or disagree?

Advertisement encourages consumers to buy in bulk, whereas it should promote high quality of the products sold. YLmMj
Advertisement helps to create awareness about latest products and their offers. It motivates people to buy more products but is should promote the quality of the product which it already sold. I completely agree that the advertisement intrigue people to buy additional products but it is not showing importance to the quality of the product. Advertisement attracts people to buy more products because it motivates them to buy by providing offers and discounts. For example, the recent advertisement in newspaper which shows, " buy one and get one for any product from this shop, offer valid till end of this month" . People are attracted to this offer and buy plenty instead of one to save their money. Moreover, advertisement shows additional feature of the product which convince consumer to buy more items. For instance, Pepsodent tooth paste advertisement in which they are showing that it will relieve from tooth sensitiveness which makes people to try and test which result in more sale of Pepsodent tooth paste In addition, the advertiser uses celebrity to endorse the product for the advertisement. To illustrate, In India famous cricketer Sachin Tendulkar endorse " boost" health drink and saying " Boost is the secret of his energy" . This advertisement makes cricket fans buy more boost product and result in high rise in sale of the product. In a nutshell, advertisement motivates people to buy more product than improving the quality of the product. The advertiser has to take extra care in quality of the product. The quality and additional benefits should be added to the advertisement so that it result in benefit to both high profit for the advertisers and also to the society.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to create awareness about
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offers
. It motivates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Did you mean "it"?
is
should promote the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
which it already sold. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
intrigue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is not showing importance to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of the product.

Advertisement attracts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it motivates them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
by providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offers
and discounts.
For example
, the recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
in newspaper which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
&quot
;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
one and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
one for any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
from this shop,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offer
valid till
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of this
Possible spelling mistake found.
month&quot
;
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are attracted
to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offer
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
instead
of one to save their money.

Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
additional feature of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
which convince consumer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
more items.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Pepsodent
tooth paste
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
in which they are showing that it will relieve from tooth sensitiveness which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
"Try and" is common in colloquial speech, but "try to" is recommended for writing.
try and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
which result in more sale of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Pepsodent
tooth
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
paste


In addition
, the advertiser
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
celebrity to endorse the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
. To illustrate, In India
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
cricketer
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sachin
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tendulkar
endorse
Possible spelling mistake found.
&quot
;
Possible spelling mistake found.
boost&quot
; health drink and saying
Possible spelling mistake found.
&quot
; Boost is the secret of his
Possible spelling mistake found.
energy&quot
;
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
cricket fans
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
more boost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
and result in high rise in sale of the product.

In a nutshell,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
motivates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
than improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. The advertiser
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
take extra care in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
and additional benefits should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that it result in benefit to both high profit for the advertisers and
also
to the society.
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IELTS essay Advertisement encourages consumers to buy in bulk, whereas it should promote high quality of the products sold.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
281 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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