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2. These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

2. These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development? OWgM
There has been a dramatic change in family role patterns in the recent century. The stereotype of the father as breadwinner is no longer valid since there is a transformation to dual-income family and in more recent years we witness home-staying fathers. There are some reasons for this new family pattern which I believe has its own perk. Perhaps the major factor here is the fact that in some families mother’s income is higher than of the father’s and since parents are eager to take care of their children by themselves it is more rational that parent with lower income give up on his job and take care of the children. However, there is not always a voluntarily choice in this matter, sometimes due to financial crisis fathers lose their job and due to the lack of job opportunities, they have to stay home. Although there has been a strong father as breadwinner role for hundreds of years, we can not say the opposite of this view is a bad idea. The root of such a role goes back to the ancient time when the outside world was highly dangerous so males go hunting and such hard activities to provide food while females take care of children against that dangerous world. As societies develop and be modernized those reasons are no longer exist. Moreover, women have shown an equal ability to men for supporting families in the financial aspect. In conclusion, due to social and vocational developments, women can take the breadwinner role to support their families while men take the role of child and home caring. Given these facts, in my opinion, it is a positive attitude that determining the role of each parent should not be based on the old tradition, in fact it must be based on the ability and skills of each gender to accept each role.
There has been a dramatic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
patterns in the recent century. The stereotype of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
as breadwinner is no longer valid since there is a transformation to dual-income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and in more recent years we witness home-staying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fathers
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons for this new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
pattern which I believe has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
perk.

Perhaps the major factor here is the fact that in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
mother’s income is higher than of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father’s
and since parents are eager to take care of their children by themselves it is more rational that parent with lower income give up on his job and take care of the children.
However
, there is not always a
voluntarily
choice in this matter,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
due to financial crisis
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fathers
lose their job and due to the lack of job opportunities, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
stay home.

Although there has been a strong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
as breadwinner
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
for hundreds of years, we can not say the opposite of this view is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
. The root of such a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
goes back to the ancient time when the outside world was
highly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
males go hunting and such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
activities to provide food while females take care of children against that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
world. As societies develop and
be modernized
those reasons are no longer exist.
Moreover
, women have shown an equal ability to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
for supporting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
in the financial aspect.

In conclusion
, due to social and vocational developments, women can take the breadwinner
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
to support their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
take the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
of child and home caring.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
these facts, in my opinion, it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
attitude that determining the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
of each parent should not
be based
on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
tradition, in fact it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be based
on the ability and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of each gender to accept each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
.
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IELTS essay 2. These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • 2. These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?