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tourists who visited Dubai and Malaysia between 1995 and 2003 in thousands.

The line chart above illustrates the number of tourists who visited Dubai and Malaysia between 1995 and 2003 in thousands. Overall, the number of tourists in both countries increased considerably over the entire period given. In the year 1995, the number of tourists who visited Dubai was 50 thousand, which was less than half the number of tourists in Malaysia in the same year. Both countries witnessed a swift increase in the number of tourists from 1996 to 1998, where Malaysia and Dubai reached double and triple their initial values, respectively. Next year, visitors to Malaysia continued to grow while it slightly decreased in Dubai. Moreover, the number of visitors between 1999 and 2001 witnessed a rapid increase in Dubai and fluctuated in Malaysia until it reached a peak of 320 thousand. From this point, the trend reversed where Dubai started receiving more tourists than Malaysia until it reached a peak of 400 thousand in 2003, on the other hand, Malaysia decreased significantly until it reached a value of 240 thousand in the same year.
The line chart above illustrates the
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number
of
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tourists
who visited Dubai and Malaysia between 1995 and 2003 in thousands.
Overall
, the
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number
of
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tourists
in both countries increased
considerably
over the entire period
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
. In the
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year
1995, the
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number
of
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tourists
who visited Dubai was 50 thousand, which was less than half the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
in Malaysia in the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. Both countries witnessed a swift increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
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tourists
from 1996 to 1998, where Malaysia and Dubai
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reached
double and triple their initial values,
respectively
.
Next
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year
, visitors to Malaysia continued to grow while it
slightly
decreased in Dubai.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of visitors between 1999 and 2001 witnessed a rapid increase in Dubai and fluctuated in Malaysia until it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reached
a peak of 320 thousand. From this point, the trend reversed where Dubai
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
receiving more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
than Malaysia until it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reached
a peak of 400 thousand in 2003,
on the other hand
, Malaysia decreased
significantly
until it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reached
a value of 240 thousand in the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
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IELTS academic tourists who visited Dubai and Malaysia between 1995 and 2003 in thousands.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
175 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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