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Thr chart below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients , all of which may be unhealthy if earten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features , and make comparison where relevant.

The pie charts indicated the average percentages of three types of nutrients in typical meals which are consuming in the USA. Namely sodium, saturated fat, and added sugars that could be unhealthy if taken out of limit. In general, according to the main meals and snack consuming of USA, Sodium usage shows a highest percentage in dinner, and saturated fat also taken in its highest percentage for dinner. Sugar added food often taken for snacks. American breakfast seems pretty poor in sodium because it shown as a 14%. Whereas for lunch pack they are having sodium in 29% while taking rich percentage for dinner. It shows as 43% percent. Interms of saturated fat, USA citizens taken 16% fat in lunch and 21% percent fat were taken with snacks. It seems that American were consumed bit high percentage of fat in their dinner and it shows as 37%. Provided data has explained that added sugar consuming rates in USA likewise 16% percent for breakfast and 19% using for lunch and 23% for dinner. The food habits of Americans showed that they like mostly to take sugar added food for their snacks except from main meals and it shows as a 42%.
The pie charts indicated the average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentages
of three types of nutrients in typical meals which are consuming in the USA.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Namely
sodium, saturated
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fat
, and
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added
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sugars
that could be unhealthy if taken out of limit.
In general
, according to the main meals and snack consuming
A determiner is probably missing here: “of the USA”.
of USA
, Sodium usage
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shows
Use “the” with the superlative.
a
highest
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percentage
in
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dinner
, and saturated
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fat
also
taken in its highest
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percentage
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dinner
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sugar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
added
food
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
taken for snacks.

American breakfast seems pretty poor in sodium
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
You used a past participle without using any required verb (‘be’ or ‘have’).
shown
as a 14%. Whereas for lunch pack they are having sodium in 29% while taking rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dinner
. It
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shows
as 43% percent.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Interms
of saturated
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fat
, USA citizens taken 16%
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fat
in lunch and 21% percent
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fat
were taken
with snacks. It seems that American
were consumed
It seems that an article is missing.
bit
high
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percentage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fat
in their
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
dinner and
it
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shows
as 37%. Provided data has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
added
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
consuming rates
A determiner is probably missing here: “in the USA”.
in USA
likewise
16% percent for breakfast and 19% using for lunch and 23% for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dinner
. The food habits of Americans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that they like
mostly
to take
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sugar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
added
food for their snacks except from main
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
meals and
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shows
as a 42%.
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IELTS academic Thr chart below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if earten too much.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
200 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Thr chart below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients , all of which may be unhealthy if earten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features , and make comparison where relevant.