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The table chart depict the information about the health

The table chart depict the information about the health yVg3
The table chart depicts the information about the health of populations of six countries. It can be clearly seen that in vietnam just above 2, 857people per docter as compare to India. Interestingly, there is little bit difference in the life expectancy between Japan and America but in china around 70% is life expantancy than other countries Surprisingly, the number increased from 210 and 420 people per docter. After that the infant martailty rate are 79% in India followed by 36% in Vietnam. Moving towards rest of the information about the figure are mortality rate around 9%, near about 31%, just under 20% in given countries respectively. Furthermore, people 2, 703 intake calorie for health in China and reach at above 3, 300 in Russia. people intake calorie in America which are more than in Japan. Only 2, 243 intake calorie in the case of India. Overall, the maximum amount of life expantancy in Japan whereas it is minimum infant mortality rate in America.
The table chart depicts the information about the health of populations of six countries. It can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that in
Possible spelling mistake found.
vietnam
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
above 2,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
857people
per
Possible spelling mistake found.
docter
as compare to India.
Interestingly
, there is
Reduce redundancy by using "little" or "bit".
little bit
difference in the life expectancy between Japan and America
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in
Capitalize this word if you mean the country, not white porcelain.
china
around 70% is life
Possible spelling mistake found.
expantancy
than other countries
Surprisingly
, the number increased
Nonstandard phrase. Did you mean: "from 210 to 420"?
from 210 and 420
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
per
Possible spelling mistake found.
docter
.
“After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
that the infant
Possible spelling mistake found.
martailty
rate are 79% in India followed by 36% in Vietnam. Moving towards rest of the information about the figure are mortality rate around 9%, near about 31%,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 20% in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
countries
respectively
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
2, 703 intake
Possible agreement error. The noun 'calorie' seems to be countable, so consider using: "calories".
calorie
for health in China and reach at above 3, 300 in Russia.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
people
intake calorie in America which are more than in Japan.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
2, 243 intake
Possible agreement error. The noun 'calorie' seems to be countable, so consider using: "calories".
calorie
in the case of India.
Overall
, the maximum amount of life
Possible spelling mistake found.
expantancy
in Japan whereas it is minimum infant mortality rate in America.

IELTS academic The table chart depict the information about the health

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
164 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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