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The rates of people affected by fever in three countries

The rates of people affected by fever in three countries nXwPR
The line graph compares three specific countries in terms of people affected by a particular disease in 1915. It is clear from the graph that, over the given period there was a significant decrease in the number of the Japanese suffering from the illness. However, the quantity of patients in Mexico showed great variations with Brazil registering a considerable growth during the given year. Despite a steady decline from January to April, the index for infected people in Japan remained stable at 800 until July. However, the figure for the same country fell to a low of nearly 190 in December. On the other hand, the proportion of sufferers in Mexico experienced a significant fluctuation over the given period reaching a high of 1190 in April and falling to a low of 400 in December. However, there was an enormous climb of 800 in may followed by a stability of 2 months. Then the figure for the same country registered a rise with the figure rising by about 1500 in the last month of the year.
The line graph compares three specific countries in terms of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by a particular disease in 1915.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
from the graph that, over the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period there was a significant decrease in the number of the Japanese suffering from the illness.
However
, the quantity of patients in Mexico
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
great variations with Brazil registering a considerable growth during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
year.

Despite a steady decline from January to April, the index for infected
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in Japan remained stable at 800 until July.
However
, the figure for the same country fell to a low of
nearly
190 in December.
On the other hand
, the proportion of sufferers in Mexico experienced a significant fluctuation over the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period reaching a high of 1190 in April and falling to a low of 400 in December.
However
, there was an enormous climb of 800 in may followed by a stability of 2 months. Then the figure for the same country registered a rise with the figure rising by about 1500 in the last month of the year.

IELTS academic The rates of people affected by fever in three countries

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
176 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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