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the proportion of the Canadian boys and girls’s favorite leisure activities.

the proportion of the Canadian boys and girls’s favorite leisure activities. BgXBV
The given bar chart compare the proportion of the Canadian boys and girls’s favorite leisure activities. The general overview here is that the boys spent their time doing leisure activities more than the girls. Both the boys and the girls like playing music at the same amount, whereas the least amount of favorite activities of the boys were playing computer games compared to shopping by the girls. the most significant difference between them was on shopping. As it can be seen that from the chart, In term of Sport, the number of boys about 25 per cent like playing this as opposed to the girls about merely 10 per cent. Similarly, the boys were higher playing computer games than the girls (around over 15 per cent and just under 15 per cent). In term of shopping, the amount of shopping of the boys (almost 35 per cent) was a massive 5-fold of the girls, which was only 5 per cent. On the other hand, it is interesting to note that the number of teenagers who like playing music were the same number between boys and girls about almost 20 percent in each.
The
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given
bar chart compare the proportion of the Canadian
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boys
and
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girls’s
favorite leisure activities. The general overview here is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
spent their time doing leisure activities more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
. Both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
music at the same amount, whereas the least amount of favorite activities of the
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boys
were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
computer games compared to shopping by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
.
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the
most significant difference between them was on shopping.

As it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that from the chart, In term of Sport, the number of
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boys
about 25 per cent like
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playing
this as opposed to the
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girls
about
merely
10 per cent.
Similarly
, the
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boys
were higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
computer games than the
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girls
(around over 15 per cent and
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just
under 15 per cent). In term of shopping, the amount of shopping of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
(almost 35 per cent) was a massive 5-fold of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
, which was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
5 per cent.

On the other hand
, it is interesting to note that the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
who like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
music were the same number between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
about almost 20 percent in each.
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IELTS academic the proportion of the Canadian boys and girls’s favorite leisure activities.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
192 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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