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The barchart show the total manufactoring production.

The barchart show the total manufactoring production. 3LX6w
The bar chart illustrates the output statistics of continents’ manufacturers from 1840 to 2000. Overall, Asia and Europe seem to be the two most productive to be compared to the rest of the World. Clearly seen from the chart, from 1984 to 1920, the rest of the World and Europe had upward trend, in contrast to Asia. European and Asian countries both had spikes at the every second in 1840 and 1920, respectively. While the statistics of the rest of the World rose as the same as Europe’s, it was only a third to a half of the big continents’ productions. After a plunged from the highest number, the total productions of Asia was accounted in 1920 just nearly a haft of the origin statistic in 1840, then started to recover and got the lead in the end of the timeline with about 45%. The golden stage of Europe stopped in 1920 and hit the rock bottom at nearly a third of the figures. The rest of the World increased steadily and hit a peak in 1960 and then inclined to the second position at the last 2000.
The bar chart illustrates the output statistics of continents’ manufacturers from 1840 to 2000.
Overall
, Asia and Europe seem to be the two most productive to
be compared
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rest
of the World.

Clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the chart, from 1984 to 1920, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rest
of the World and Europe had upward
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "trended".
trend
,
in contrast
to Asia. European and Asian countries both had spikes at the every second in 1840 and 1920,
respectively
. While the statistics of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rest
of the World rose as the same as Europe’s, it was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a third to a half of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
continents’ productions.

After a plunged from the highest number, the total productions of Asia
was accounted
in 1920
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
nearly
a haft of the origin statistic in 1840, then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to recover and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
the lead in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the timeline with about 45%. The golden stage of Europe
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
in 1920 and hit the rock bottom at
nearly
a third of the figures. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rest
of the World increased
steadily
and hit a peak in 1960 and then inclined to the second position at the last 2000.
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IELTS academic The barchart show the total manufactoring production.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
188 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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