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The plans show Ashford in 2010 and Ashford now

The plans show Ashford in 2010 and Ashford now Q8JDx
The two maps illustrate the alterations which have occured in Ashford between 2010 and today. Overall, it is apparent that the Western bank of the river nearly has stayed unchanged while the other side has completely developed. One interesting change is that many buildings have sprung up along the river shore which is located in the North West of the residential area in Ashford. Moreover, there has been an increase in the amount of individual houses here, which seems to make this place more crowded. The road from the residential area has also been expanded, leading to the whole new Yacht marina in the South of the river Tam. The construction of the bridge can be seen as a noticeable development in Ashford. It has accessed the Western part to the Eastern part which used to be two separated ones connected only by ferry in 2010. Furthermore, Ashford has become greener, with plenty of trees grown in the South West.
The two maps illustrate the alterations which have
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "occurred", the past tense form of the verb 'occur'?
occured
in Ashford between 2010 and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.

Overall
, it is apparent that the Western bank of the river
nearly
has stayed unchanged while the other side has completely developed.

One interesting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
buildings have sprung up along the river shore which
is located
in the North West of the residential area in Ashford.
Moreover
, there has been an increase in the amount of individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
here, which seems to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
this place more crowded. The road from the residential area has
also
been expanded
, leading to the whole new Yacht marina in the South of the river Tam.

The construction of the bridge can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
as a noticeable development in Ashford. It has accessed the Western part to the Eastern part which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be two separated ones connected
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
by ferry in 2010.
Furthermore
, Ashford has become greener, with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of trees grown in the South West.
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IELTS academic The plans show Ashford in 2010 and Ashford now

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
160 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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