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The pie charts given illustrate the proportion of people who worked for three different sectors in town A and B within 50 years, starting from 1960.

The pie charts given illustrate the proportion of people who worked for three different sectors in town A and B within 50 years, starting from 1960. 0wno9
The pie charts given illustrate the proportion of people who worked for three different sectors in town A and B within 50 years, starting from 1960. Overall, the manufacturing workers in two towns showed an upward trend, whereas a reduction was seen in sales jobs. Another key feature is that manufacturing sectors had the highest employment. Concerning town A, 30% of people had sales jobs in 1960. This figure was somewhat halved by the end. A similar trend was seen in the services worker, which declined by 15% in 2010. By contrast, manufacturing sectors rose incredibly from 29% to 64% during the period examined. In terms of town B, the percentage of sales workers was 72% in 1960. This figure fell by 18% in 2010. Conversely, the manufacturing worker increased by 16% from 8% in 1960. Similarly, the proportion of service workers rose slightly from 20% to 22%.
The pie charts
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
illustrate the proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who worked for three
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different
sectors in
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town
A and B within 50 years, starting from 1960.

Overall
, the
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manufacturing
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workers
in two
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towns
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
an upward trend, whereas a reduction was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in sales jobs. Another key feature is that
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manufacturing
sectors had the highest employment.

Concerning
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town
A, 30% of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
had sales jobs in 1960. This figure was somewhat halved by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
. A similar trend was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the services
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worker
, which declined by 15% in 2010. By contrast,
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manufacturing
sectors rose
incredibly
from 29% to 64% during the period examined.

In terms of
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town
B, the percentage of sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
was 72% in 1960. This figure fell by 18% in 2010.
Conversely
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
manufacturing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worker
increased by 16% from 8% in 1960.
Similarly
, the proportion of service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
rose
slightly
from 20% to 22%.
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IELTS academic The pie charts given illustrate the proportion of people who worked for three different sectors in town A and B within 50 years, starting from 1960.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
148 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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