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The pie chart shows the online sales for retail sectors in Canada in the year 2019 and 2020

Provided pie charts give information on shares of products in retail sector sold via internet in 2019 and 2020 years. Overall, it can be seen that online sale of electronic appliance doubled in 2020, while the sale of clothing decreased by twice. According to the first pie chart, almost 40 per cent of online sales in 2019 related to clothing, which was two times more than the share of electronic appliance. The second biggest share, which was a bit less than the third of the market share and exceeded the share of groceries by two times, belonged to home and kitchen. As it can be seen from the second graph, in 2020 the share of clothing decreased to 22 per cent, equaling to the share of groceries and surpassing the amount of home and kitchen wares by twice. The sale of the electronic appliances became the leader of the market reaching 45 per cent of total online sales in the retail market.
Provided pie charts give information on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shares
of products in retail sector sold via internet in 2019 and 2020 years.
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
of electronic appliance doubled in 2020, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
of clothing decreased by twice.

According to the
first
pie chart, almost 40 per cent of online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
in 2019 related to clothing, which was two times more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
of electronic appliance. The second biggest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
, which was a bit less than the third of the market
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
and exceeded the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
of groceries by two times, belonged to home and kitchen.

As it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the second graph, in 2020 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
of clothing decreased to 22 per cent, equaling to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
of groceries and surpassing the amount of home and kitchen wares by twice. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sale
of the electronic appliances became the leader of the market reaching 45 per cent of total online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
in the retail market.
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IELTS academic The pie chart shows the online sales for retail sectors in Canada in the year 2019 and 2020

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
162 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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