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The maps illustrate changes in the layout of Happy Valley Shopping Centre over the period of thirty years from 1982 to 2012.

The maps illustrate changes in the layout of Happy Valley Shopping Centre over the period of thirty years from 1982 to 2012. n69XE
The maps illustrate changes in the layout of Happy Valley Shopping Centre over the period of thirty years from 1982 to 2012. It is clear that this centre witnessed a significant change in terms of both scale and different inner sectors. In 1982, visitors had to go along the road and through doors which led into a lobby, However, this road was demolished to make room for the parking lot, which was shown on the 2012's layout. Moreover, the building space was expanded extensively due to the construction of the furniture retail which superseded the lake in 1982. The different areas inside the building changed nearly completely. To be specific, three reaming sectors which were sports, electronics and food store were relocated. Besides, a chain of restaurants occupied the area that was used for sports and electronics store. At the left-hand corner of the building, the coffee shop was knocked down to make way for other sectors in the building.
The maps illustrate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the layout of Happy Valley Shopping
Possible spelling mistake. 'Centre' is British English.
Centre
over the period of thirty years from 1982 to 2012.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that this
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
witnessed a significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in terms of both scale and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
inner sectors.

In 1982, visitors had to go along the road and through doors which led into a lobby,
However
, this road
was demolished
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
room for the parking lot, which
was shown
on the 2012's layout.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
space
was expanded
extensively
due to the construction of the furniture retail which superseded the lake in 1982.

The
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
areas inside the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
nearly
completely. To be specific, three reaming sectors which were sports, electronics and food store
were relocated
.
Besides
, a chain of restaurants occupied the area that was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for sports and electronics store. At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
-hand corner of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
, the coffee shop
was knocked
down to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
way for other sectors in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
.
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IELTS academic The maps illustrate changes in the layout of Happy Valley Shopping Centre over the period of thirty years from 1982 to 2012.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
160 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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