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The line graph compares the percentage of elderly people from 3 countries

The line graph compares the percentage of elderly people from 3 countries AwWLx
The line graph compares the percentage of elderly people from 3 countries (Japan, Sweden and the USA) over a period of 6 years between 1940 and 2040. Overall, there was a rise in the rate of people from the age of 65 and above between 1940 and 2020, and following that an increase is predicted for all countries from 2020 to 2040. At the start of the period, the USA had the highest percentage of people aged 65 and over, which is predicted to be replaced by Japan in 2040. In 1960, the proportion of elderly people was just under 10%. The figures for Sweden and the USA were lower, at about 7% and 5% respectively. There was a slight increase in the percentage of elderly people from the USA from about 9% to 10% and from Sweden from around 7% to about 8% between 1940 and 1960, whereas Japan experienced a change with about a half decrease in the same years.
The line graph compares the percentage of elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from 3 countries (Japan, Sweden and the USA) over a period of 6 years between 1940 and 2040.

Overall
, there was a rise in the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from the age of 65 and above between 1940 and 2020, and following that an increase
is predicted
for all countries from 2020 to 2040. At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of the period, the USA had the highest percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aged 65 and over, which
is predicted
to
be replaced
by Japan in 2040.

In 1960, the proportion of elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 10%. The figures for Sweden and the USA
Did you mean "where" or "we"?
were
lower, at about 7% and 5%
respectively
. There was a slight increase in the percentage of elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from the USA from about 9% to 10% and from Sweden from around 7% to about 8% between 1940 and 1960, whereas Japan experienced a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
with about a half decrease in the same years.
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IELTS academic The line graph compares the percentage of elderly people from 3 countries

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
162 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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