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The information regarding the proportion of women who were working between the age 15 to 64 years in distinct five nations from 2003 to 2009 has depicted in the line graph. Overall, the striking point from the graph is that the women who were working in Iceland and Canada showed a markedly upward trend where as, those of Chile and Turkey showed a downward trend. At a first glance, in 2003 exactly 80% and 70% each of the female worked in Iceland and Canada. The percentage of the Canada woman worker eventually came down to near 2 to 3% then shared a same proportion in next three years. In contrast, the number of women workers in Iceland moderate decrease in all years in 2003 it was above 80% and in 2009 it was fall to below 80%. What is serving further, in 2003 above 20% female were employed in Turkey which was least as compare to other nations. Then, in 2005 it fell slightly to 20% and share the same percentage in 2007. After two year, it again reached to above 20%. Besides, chill

The information regarding the proportion of women who were working between the age 15 to 64 years in distinct five nations from 2003 to 2009 has depicted in the line graph. Overall, the striking point from the graph is that the women who were working in Iceland and Canada showed a markedly upward trend where as, those of Chile and Turkey showed a downward trend. At a first glance, in 2003 exactly 80% and 70% each of the female worked in Iceland and Canada. The percentage of the Canada woman worker eventually came down to near 2 to 3% then shared a same proportion in next three years. In contrast, the number of women workers in Iceland moderate decrease in all years in 2003 it was above 80% and in 2009 it was fall to below 80%. What is serving further, in 2003 above 20% female were employed in Turkey which was least as compare to other nations. Then, in 2005 it fell slightly to 20% and share the same percentage in 2007. After two year, it again reached to above 20%. Besides, chill J7p0
The information regarding the proportion of women who were working between the age 15 to 64 years in distinct five nations from 2003 to 2009 has depicted in the line graph. Overall, the striking point from the graph is that the women who were working in Iceland and Canada showed a markedly upward trend where as, those of Chile and Turkey showed a downward trend. At a first glance, in 2003 exactly 80% and 70% each of the female worked in Iceland and Canada. The percentage of the Canada woman worker eventually came down to near 2 to 3% then shared a same proportion in next three years. In contrast, the number of women workers in Iceland moderate decrease in all years in 2003 it was above 80% and in 2009 it was fall to below 80%. What is serving further, in 2003 above 20% female were employed in Turkey which was least as compare to other nations. Then, in 2005 it fell slightly to 20% and share the same percentage in 2007. After two year, it again reached to above 20%. Besides, chill was the second least where women were less work in starting here it was noticed that near about 30% female employed then rose minimally lead to 10% in 2009.
The information regarding the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
who were working between the age 15 to 64 years in distinct five nations from 2003 to 2009 has depicted in the line graph.

Overall
, the striking point from the graph is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
who were working in Iceland and Canada
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a
markedly
upward trend
Did you mean "whereas"?
where as
, those of Chile and Turkey
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a downward trend.

At a
first
glance, in 2003 exactly 80% and 70% each of the female worked in Iceland and Canada. The percentage of the Canada woman worker
eventually
came down to near 2 to 3% then shared a same proportion in
next
three years.
In contrast
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
workers in Iceland moderate decrease in all years in 2003 it was above 80% and in 2009 it was fall to below 80%.

What is serving
further
, in 2003 above 20% female
were employed
in Turkey which was least as compare to other nations. Then, in 2005 it fell
slightly
to 20% and share the same percentage in 2007. After two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, it again reached to above 20%.
Besides
, chill was the second least where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
were less work in starting here it
was noticed
that near about 30% female employed then rose
minimally
lead to 10% in 2009.
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IELTS academic The information regarding the proportion of women who were working between the age 15 to 64 years in distinct five nations from 2003 to 2009 has depicted in the line graph. Overall, the striking point from the graph is that the women who were working in Iceland and Canada showed a markedly upward trend where as, those of Chile and Turkey showed a downward trend. At a first glance, in 2003 exactly 80% and 70% each of the female worked in Iceland and Canada. The percentage of the Canada woman worker eventually came down to near 2 to 3% then shared a same proportion in next three years. In contrast, the number of women workers in Iceland moderate decrease in all years in 2003 it was above 80% and in 2009 it was fall to below 80%. What is serving further, in 2003 above 20% female were employed in Turkey which was least as compare to other nations. Then, in 2005 it fell slightly to 20% and share the same percentage in 2007. After two year, it again reached to above 20%. Besides, chill

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
213 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • The information regarding the proportion of women who were working between the age 15 to 64 years in distinct five nations from 2003 to 2009 has depicted in the line graph. Overall, the striking point from the graph is that the women who were working in Iceland and Canada showed a markedly upward trend where as, those of Chile and Turkey showed a downward trend. At a first glance, in 2003 exactly 80% and 70% each of the female worked in Iceland and Canada. The percentage of the Canada woman worker eventually came down to near 2 to 3% then shared a same proportion in next three years. In contrast, the number of women workers in Iceland moderate decrease in all years in 2003 it was above 80% and in 2009 it was fall to below 80%. What is serving further, in 2003 above 20% female were employed in Turkey which was least as compare to other nations. Then, in 2005 it fell slightly to 20% and share the same percentage in 2007. After two year, it again reached to above 20%. Besides, chill