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The graph below shows the population of particular country by age group starting in 1960 and including a forecast to 2040.

The graph below shows the population of particular country by age group starting in 1960 and including a forecast to 2040. 58OA
The graph illustrates the trend of population in the past and in the future of a country on the basis of three age groups from 1960 to 1940. Overall, it can be seen that the population of the children and the youngsters is decreasing while there is an increase in the old aged group. Additionally, the population of young people is maximum throughout the period of 80 years. In 1960 about 30% of total population was of children and just over half of the population consist of people aged between 15 to 64 years. These numbers were dropped to 21 % and just below 50% respectively till the current year. The prediction is this fall will continue till the end of given period. On contrary, the population of the elders was 15% in 1960 which is the least and it remained same for next 10 years. Thereafter, it started increasing steadily until the present year. The forecast is there will be continuous rise number and about 45% of population will be of old age people in 1940.
The graph illustrates the trend of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in the past and in the future of a country on the basis of three age groups from 1960 to 1940.

Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
of the children and the youngsters is decreasing while there is an increase in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
aged group.
Additionally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
of young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
is maximum throughout the period of 80 years.

In 1960 about 30% of total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
was of children and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over half of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
consist of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aged
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 15 and 64".
between 15 to 64
years. These numbers
were dropped
to 21 % and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
below 50%
respectively
till the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. The prediction is this fall will continue till the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.

On contrary, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
of the elders was 15% in 1960 which is the least and it remained same for
next
10 years. Thereafter, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
increasing
steadily
until the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. The forecast is there will be continuous rise number and about 45% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
will be of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
age
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in 1940.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the population of particular country by age group starting in 1960 and including a forecast to 2040.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
177 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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