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The graph below shows the participation of the Australian children in sports outside school hours in 2014.

The graph below shows the participation of the Australian children in sports outside school hours in 2014. q7JG
The bar graph provides the information about the participation aap Australian juveniles in sports such as Swimming, Football, Netball and Basketball off outside the school hours in 2014. Overall, we can see after school hours boys played Football proportion was highest while girls significantly interested in Netball. Boys played Netball ratio was lowest and girls less interested in playing Football. In 2014, after the school boys participated in Swimming ratio was more than 10% while engaged in no sport proportion was lower than 5%. Moreover, Football and Netball sports played by boys after the school hours rates were 20%, 3% respectively. Eventually, in 2014 boys played Basketball proportion was 7%. After school hours girls played Netball proportion was highest and it was 17% as well as Football ratio was lower up to 3%. Furthermore, in 2014 girls participated in Basketball ratio was more than 5% while they did not interested in any sports rate was 5%. Finally, girls interested in Swimming after school hours was 14% in 2014.
The bar graph provides the information about the participation
Possible spelling mistake found.
aap
Australian juveniles in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
such as Swimming,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Football
, Netball and Basketball off outside the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
in 2014.
Overall
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
played
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Football
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
was
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
significantly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interested
in Netball.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Boys
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
played
Netball
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ratio
was lowest and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interested
in playing Football.

In 2014, after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
participated in Swimming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ratio
was more than 10% while engaged in no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
was lower than 5%.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Football
and Netball
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
played
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
rates were 20%, 3%
respectively
.
Eventually
, in 2014
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
played
Basketball
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
was 7%.

After
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
played
Netball
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
was highest and it was 17%
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Football
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ratio
was lower up to 3%.
Furthermore
, in 2014
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
participated in Basketball
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ratio
was more than 5% while they did not
The verb 'did' requires the base form of the verb: "interest"
interested
in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
rate was 5%.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interested
in Swimming after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
was 14% in 2014.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the participation of the Australian children in sports outside school hours in 2014.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
168 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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