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The graph below shows the fishing industry in a European country according to four indicators.

The graph below shows the fishing industry in a European country according to four indicators. 6NwLx
The provided statistical table elucidates the fishing company in a European nation. A comparison has been made between four different indicators. The data has been calibrated in percentage. Overall, a quick glance at the graph reveals that, small scale ship require a huge manpower to catch a lower amount of fish for food although big sale ships must be hired a less manpower to collect higher amount of fish food. First and foremost, for big scale ship industry only 500, 000 worker require however it is increased in small scale fishing boats and hired 120, 000, 000 employees. Secondly, every year around 29 million tonnes food is catched by huge scale ships in contrast it reduced around 5 million tonnes for tiny scale boats. Last but not the least, industrial process were 22 for big scale and none for small scale. Furthermore, annual cost difference between both boats were very higher for former is £ 25000-350000 and latter is £ 200-300 per person. Eventually, 65, 000 and 8, 500 utilize fuel/oil by both each vessel respectively.
The provided statistical table elucidates the fishing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
in a European nation. A comparison has
been made
between four
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
indicators. The data has
been calibrated
in percentage.

Overall
, a quick glance at the graph reveals that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ship
require a huge manpower to catch a lower amount of fish for food although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
sale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ships
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be hired
a less manpower to collect higher amount of fish food.

First
and foremost, for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ship
industry
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
500, 000 worker require
however
it
is increased
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scale
fishing boats and hired 120, 000, 000 employees.
Secondly
, every year around 29 million tonnes food is
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "caught", the past tense form of the verb 'catch'?
catched
by huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ships
in contrast
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
around 5 million tonnes for tiny
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scale
boats. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the least, industrial process were 22 for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scale
and none for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
scale.

Furthermore
, annual cost difference between both boats were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
higher for former is £ 25000-350000 and latter is £ 200-300 per person.
Eventually
, 65, 000 and 8, 500 utilize fuel/oil by both each vessel
respectively
.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the fishing industry in a European country according to four indicators.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
176 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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