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The graph below shows the figures for imprisonment in the United States, Britain, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada over a period of 50 years.

The graph below shows the figures for imprisonment in the United States, Britain, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada over a period of 50 years. q1LjX
The bar graph gives information about the number of people in prison in the United States, Britain, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada over a period of 50 years. While the fluctuation of the figures for the number of prisoners was obtained, it is clear that the United States had the maximum level of imprisonment overall. Britain, on the other hand, had the minimum level of imprisonment for the majority of the period. As it can be seen from the graph, the highest population of prisoners was in the United States among the other countries, where the figure for this country was about 140000 people in 1980. Similarly, Canada had the highest prison population trend with the number of almost 120000 prisoners in 1930 and 1950. The figures for New Zealand and Australia alternate between 40000 and 100000 prisoners, even though the New Zealand’s trend intended to be higher than Australia. With regard to Britain, unlike the other countries, the prisoner’s figure increases steadily from 1930 to 1980, reaching a peak of nearly 80000 at the end of the period.
The bar graph gives information about the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in prison in the United States, Britain, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada over a period of 50 years.

While the fluctuation of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
for the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisoners
was obtained
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the United States had the maximum level of imprisonment
overall
. Britain,
on the other hand
, had the minimum level of imprisonment for the majority of the period.

As it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the graph, the highest population of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisoners
was in the United States among the other countries, where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
for this country was about 140000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in 1980.
Similarly
, Canada had the highest prison population trend with the number of almost 120000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisoners
in 1930 and 1950.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figures
for New Zealand and Australia alternate between 40000 and 100000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisoners
,
even though
the New Zealand’s trend intended to be higher than Australia.

With regard to Britain, unlike the other countries, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisoner’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
increases
steadily
from 1930 to 1980, reaching a peak of
nearly
80000 at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the figures for imprisonment in the United States, Britain, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada over a period of 50 years.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
179 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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