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The given plans display a difference between public park in 1920 and in today.

The given plans display a difference between public park in 1920 and in today. OrqKp
The given plans display a difference between public park in 1920 and in today. It can be seen from the picture that, the grange park in 1920 was different from today. Firstly, the park is located between the Arnold Avenue and the endron street. In 1920, there were number of seats all around the park, whereas there are only four seats located around the rose garden in the center of park. Moreover, in past there were three rose garden, on the contrary, there are two rose garden as of now. In the year 1920, fountain was there in the middle of park, which is now replaced by the rose garden. Furthi, the place for musician is now converted into large amphitheatre for concerts. Moreover, one more feature is added in park, which is cafe. Additionally, earlier there was no children's play area in the park, also that area was covered by pond for water plants. Furthermore, glasshouse is now replaced by water feature. In last, the underground car park is included in park. To conclude, the France park is now have more facility as compared to past.
The
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given
plans display a difference between public
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park
in 1920 and in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.

It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the picture that, the grange
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park
in 1920 was
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different
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
Firstly
, the
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park
is located
between the Arnold Avenue and the
Possible spelling mistake found.
endron
street. In 1920, there were number of seats all around the
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park
, whereas there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
four seats located around the
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rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
in the center of
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park
.
Moreover
, in past there were three
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rose
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garden
,
on the contrary
, there are two
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rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
as of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.

In the year 1920, fountain was there in the middle of
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park
, which is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
replaced by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Furthi
, the place for musician is
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now
converted into large
Possible spelling mistake. 'amphitheatre' is British English.
amphitheatre
for concerts.
Moreover
, one more feature is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
, which is
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
.
Additionally
, earlier
Did you mean "there were no children"?
there was no children
's play area in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
,
also
that area
was covered
by pond for water plants.
Furthermore
, glasshouse is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
replaced by water feature. In last, the underground car
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
is included
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
.
To conclude
, the France
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park
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
have more facility as compared to past.
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IELTS academic The given plans display a difference between public park in 1920 and in today.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
187 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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