Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The following graph shows the estimated number of sentenced prisoners of different races in the US in December, 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The following graph shows the estimated number of sentenced prisoners of different races in the US in December, 2010. App2e
The bar graph represents, the number of prisoners of different age groups in december, 2010 and it focuses on different races in the US. Overall, it is evident from the graph that the number of prisoners were the highest among the black's of the age groups 26-33. It is interesting to note that, white's have seen a major decline in the graph among the old people. Another interesting feature is that the blacks, 58-65 years have the least number of prisoners. Additionally, latino's come in between the white's and the black's. However, from the graph it can be observed that there has been no major changes in the level's of the prisoners of the age group 18-41, it lies between 1000 to 2000. Moreover, there is a major drop in the numbers in the elderly catergory ie, 42 plus. In conclusion, majority of the prisoner's were black among the various age groups and white's were the least.
The bar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graph
represents, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of prisoners of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
in
When specifying a month and year, the comma is unnecessary: "december 2010".
december, 2010
and it focuses on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
races in the US.

Overall
, it is evident from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graph
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of prisoners were the highest among the black's of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
26-33.

It is interesting to note that, white's have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a major decline in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graph
among the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. Another interesting feature is that the blacks, 58-65 years have the least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of prisoners.

Additionally
,
Consider using the plural form here: "latinos".
latino's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
in between the white's and the black's.
However
, from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graph
it can
be observed
that there has been no major
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the level's of the prisoners of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
18-41, it lies
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1000 and 2000".
between 1000 to 2000
.
Moreover
, there is a major drop in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
numbers
in the elderly
Possible spelling mistake found.
catergory
Possible spelling mistake found.
ie
, 42 plus.

In conclusion
,
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
the prisoner's were black among the various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
and
Consider using the plural form here: "whites".
white's
were the least.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS academic The following graph shows the estimated number of sentenced prisoners of different races in the US in December, 2010.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
157 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • The following graph shows the estimated number of sentenced prisoners of different races in the US in December, 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant