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The diagrams below give information about the manufacture of frozen fish pies.

The diagrams below give information about the manufacture of frozen fish pies. PV7NB
The diagrams illustrate how the fish pies produced. Overall, there are two diagrams explain the four ingredients prepared to make a fish pie and many steps to make a fish pie. The first diagram show materials to make a fish pie that contains peas, sauces, fishes and potatoes and then put all materials on the equipment in a microwaveable container. While the second diagram illustrates the line production of fish pie. It can be, divide into three big steps. Firstly, the potato processing where the machine receives potatoes has a month shelf life, cleaning the potato, peeling, slice, boil and then chilling the potato. In the second step, the potato store previously then seasoning them, compound with peas and fish, automatically remove skins and bones of fish by the machine. In these steps, the output is fresh salmon. Thirdly, the fish pie wrapped, freeze, and store until packing for delivery in 12 hours or less.
The diagrams illustrate how the fish pies produced.

Overall
, there are two diagrams
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the four ingredients prepared to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a fish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pie
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
steps
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a fish pie.

The
first
diagram
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
materials to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a fish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pie
that contains peas, sauces, fishes and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
potatoes
and then put all materials on the equipment in a microwaveable container.

“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
the second diagram illustrates the line production of fish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pie
. It can be, divide into three
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
steps
.
Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
potato
processing where the machine receives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
potatoes
has a month shelf life, cleaning the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
potato
, peeling, slice, boil and then chilling the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
potato
. In the second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
step
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
potato
store previously then seasoning them, compound with peas and fish,
automatically
remove skins and bones of fish by the machine. In these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
steps
, the output is fresh salmon.
Thirdly
, the fish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pie
wrapped, freeze, and store until packing for delivery in 12 hours or less.
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IELTS academic The diagrams below give information about the manufacture of frozen fish pies.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
155 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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