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The diagram illustrates the procedure of brick manufacture for building industry.

The diagram illustrates the procedure of brick manufacture for building industry. wbWl
The diagram illustrates the procedure of brick manufacture for building industry. Overall, there are 8 steps in process, beginning with the digging up of clay and culminating in delivery. To begin, the clay is dug up by a special digger machine before sending it to roller. Metal grid is used to brake up the clay into smaller pieces. By adding sand and water, the mixture is turned into bricks by either placing it into a mould or using wire cutter. Then, bricks are replaced in oven in order to dry it about 24-48 hours. In the subsequent stage, the bricks go through heating and cooling process. Firstly, they are heated up in kiln at a moderate and then a high temperature (870-1300 degrees), followed by cooling in cooling chamber about 2-4 days. To sum up, the bricks are packed and delivered to their destination.
The diagram illustrates the procedure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brick
manufacture for building industry.
Overall
, there are 8 steps in process, beginning with the digging up of clay and culminating in delivery.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, the clay
is dug
up by a special digger machine
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
sending it to roller. Metal grid is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to brake up the clay into smaller pieces. By adding sand and water, the mixture
is turned
into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bricks
by either placing it into a
Possible spelling mistake. 'mould' is British English.
mould
or using wire cutter. Then,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bricks
are replaced
in oven in order to dry it about 24-48 hours.

In the subsequent stage, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bricks
go through heating and cooling process.
Firstly
, they
are heated
up in kiln at a moderate and then a high temperature (870-1300 degrees), followed by cooling in cooling chamber about 2-4 days.

To sum up, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bricks
are packed
and delivered to their destination.
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IELTS academic The diagram illustrates the procedure of brick manufacture for building industry.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
144 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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