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The diagram explains the stages and equipments used in the cement making process and how it is used to produce concrete.

The diagram explains the stages and equipments used in the cement making process and how it is used to produce concrete. gWK1D
The diagram explains the stages and equipments used in the cement making process and how it is used to produce concrete. Overall the ingradients that are using in the cement production is less than that of concrete production. However the machinaries for the production of cement is much more than in concrete production. The cement production starts when the limestone and clay puts in a crusher. The powder which is collected through this process moves to a mixer. It is connected to a rotating heater and mix later transferred into a grinder. As a result, cement is made. Finally this collected into bags. However, in concrete production, all four ingredients like cement, water, sand and gravel collected in an adequate ratio of 15%, 10%, 25% and 50% put into a concrete mixer and concrete will be produced.
The diagram
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
the stages and equipments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
making process and how it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to produce concrete.

Overall
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
ingradients
that are using in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
is less than that of concrete
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
machinaries
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
is much more than in concrete production.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
when the limestone and clay puts in a crusher. The powder which
is collected
through this process
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moves
to a mixer. It
is connected
to a rotating heater and mix later transferred into a grinder.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
is made
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
this collected into bags.

However
, in concrete
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
, all four ingredients like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
, water, sand and gravel collected in an adequate ratio of 15%, 10%, 25% and 50% put into a concrete mixer and concrete will
be produced
.
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IELTS academic The diagram explains the stages and equipments used in the cement making process and how it is used to produce concrete.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
137 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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