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The diagram below shows the life cycle of a salmon, from egg to adult fish. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the life cycle of a salmon, from egg to adult fish. 05Bq
The diagram illustrates the steps involved in salmon's life cycle, from incubation to maturation. In order to born and grow until become the adult salmon, there are 2 main areas that salmon live their life. First is living in the river when it is baby salmon and then move to the estuary when they are grow and mature. The starting point of the life cycle of a salmon start with having sprawn between two adult salmons in the river and incubate. After hatching from its egg, baby salmons live in freshwater before it grow enough to swim to estuary area. Teenage salmon live in the estuary area for a while, then it migrate to rearing areas where is in the ocean. salmon grow and become mature in this area. Finally, when it ready to incubate, it migrates back to the river where it is a suitable spawning area for them.
The diagram illustrates the steps involved in salmon's life cycle, from incubation to maturation.

In order to
Did you mean "bear"?
born
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grow
until become the adult salmon, there are 2 main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
that salmon
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
their life.
First
is living in the river when it is baby salmon and then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to the estuary when they are
Consider using a past participle here: "grown".
grow
and mature.

The starting point of the life cycle of a salmon
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with having
Possible spelling mistake found.
sprawn
between two adult salmons in the river and incubate. After hatching from its egg, baby salmons
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in freshwater
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grow
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to swim to estuary area.

Teenage salmon
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the estuary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
for a while, then it
Did you mean "migrates"?
migrate
to rearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
where is in the ocean.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
salmon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grow
and become mature in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
.
Finally
, when
Did you mean "it is"?
it
Did you mean "readies"?
ready
to incubate, it migrates back to the river where it is a suitable spawning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
for them.
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IELTS academic The diagram below shows the life cycle of a salmon, from egg to adult fish.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
150 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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