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the charts show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. compare and summarise the information

the charts show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. compare and kYJDR
The information in the pie charts shows the percentage of water used for different purposes in six different areas of the world. over all, most amount of water used in 4 of 6 different areas is for agriculture use. However, in North America and in Europe, the most portion is used for industrial purposes. In terms of domestic use, South America comes first with 19% use of water and after that, Europe and North America use 15% and 13% respectively which is almost twice the amount of water consumed in South East Asia and Central Asia for this cause. The most significant feature in the charts is the amount of water used for industrial purpose in Central Asia which is the smallest percentage in the world at 5%. While in the same place, 88% of water is used for agricultural use. However, in Europe and south America where agricultural use is relatively lower at 32% and 39% in turn, the water used for industrial use is highest at 53% and 48% respectively.
The information in the pie charts
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shows
the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
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used
for
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different
purposes in six
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different
areas of the world.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
over
all, most amount of
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water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in 4 of 6
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
areas is for agriculture
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
However
, in North America and in Europe, the most portion is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for industrial purposes.

In terms of domestic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
, South America
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comes
first
with 19%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
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water
and after that, Europe and North America
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
15% and 13%
respectively
which is almost twice the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
consumed in South East Asia and Central Asia for this cause.

The most significant feature in the charts is the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for industrial purpose in Central Asia which is the smallest percentage in the world at 5%. While in the same place, 88% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for agricultural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
However
, in Europe and
Capitalize specific, well-defined geographical regions: "South America"
south America
where agricultural
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
is
relatively
lower at 32% and 39% in turn, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for industrial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
is highest at 53% and 48%
respectively
.
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IELTS academic the charts show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. compare and

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
172 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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