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The charts below show changes in the proportion of the energy produced from different resources in a country in 1985 and 2003.

The given pie charts compare the changes in the energy production share of five sources between year 1985 and 2003. Overall, the energy share of coal and natural gas grew while that of oil and nuclear power shrunk. However, oil still remained the biggest source of energy in both the years. Moving on to the details, despite a fall of 13%, oil's figures of 52% and 39% for years 1985 and 2003 were by fur the highest. In contrast, the energy generated from hydropower remained the lowest at a meagre 4% for both the years. During the same time, share rose from merely 8% to almost a quarter of the total energy (22%). A striking coincidence was witnessed in care of nuclear energy which showed and exactly opposite trend. It's contribution fell from 22% to just 8%. Finally, the share of natural gas had nearly doubled from 13% by year 1985 to 23% in 2003.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
pie charts compare the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the
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energy
production
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
of five sources between year 1985 and 2003.

Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
of coal and natural gas grew while that of oil and nuclear power shrunk.
However
, oil
still
remained the biggest source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
in both the years.

Moving on to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, despite a fall of 13%, oil's figures of 52% and 39% for years 1985 and 2003 were by fur the highest.
In contrast
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
generated from hydropower remained the lowest at a
Possible spelling mistake. ‘meagre’ is British English.
meagre
4% for both the years.

During the same time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
rose from
merely
8% to almost a quarter of the total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
(22%). A striking coincidence
was witnessed
in care of nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
and exactly opposite trend.
It seems that the possessive pronoun “its” fits better in this context.
It's
contribution fell from 22% to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
8%.
Finally
, the
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share
of natural gas had
nearly
doubled from 13% by year 1985 to 23% in 2003.
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IELTS academic The charts below show changes in the proportion of the energy produced from different resources in a country in 1985 and 2003.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
155 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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