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The chart show the percentage of females aged 16-25 in a particular country, who participated in sports, compared with the percentage of females who watched them in 2000

The chart show the percentage of females aged 16-25 in a particular country, who participated in sports, compared with the percentage of females who watched them in 2000 gbRML
A glance at the supplied bar graph reveals the proportion of females watching and participating in sports in the age of 16-25 in 2000. Overall, the percentage of females watching sports was higher than one of being a participant. Moreover, the number of females watching tennis was the highest and the rate of females evolving in horse riding and racing was the lowest. Regarding tennis, gymnastics, basketball, and horse riding and racing, the proportion of people watching was higher. In tennis, the rate of women watching was approximately double to one of participating, about 60 and 30 percent respectively. Gymnastics experienced a similar trend with the figure was 20 and nearly 10 percent. Furthermore, there was an alike tendency in basketball and horse riding and racing, which the percentage of female watching remained higher but not much. To clarify, the rate of watching and participating was over 50 percent in basketball, and under 10 percent in horse racing. Concerning badminton and golf, there was a reverse trend, in which the proportion of women as a participant is higher than one of watching. To explain, the rate of females participating in badminton was double the figure of watching, about nearly 10 and 5 percent. Golf was simlar when the figure of participating is one-third of the figure of evolving, at 10 and 30 percent respectively.
A glance at the supplied bar graph reveals the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
watching and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
participating
in sports in the age of 16-25 in 2000.

Overall
, the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
watching sports was higher than one of being a participant.
Moreover
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
watching tennis was the highest and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
evolving in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
horse
riding and racing was the lowest.

Regarding tennis, gymnastics, basketball, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
horse
riding and racing, the proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
watching was higher. In tennis, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of women watching was approximately double to one of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
participating
, about 60 and 30
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
respectively
. Gymnastics experienced a similar trend with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
was 20 and
nearly
10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
.
Furthermore
, there was an alike tendency in basketball and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
horse
riding and racing, which the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
watching remained higher
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not much. To clarify, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of watching and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
participating
was over 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
in basketball, and under 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
horse
racing.

Concerning badminton and golf, there was a reverse trend, in which the proportion of women as a participant is higher than one of watching. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
participating
in badminton was double the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
of watching, about
nearly
10 and 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
. Golf was
Possible spelling mistake found.
simlar
when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
participating
is one-third of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
figure
of evolving, at 10 and 30
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
respectively
.
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IELTS academic The chart show the percentage of females aged 16-25 in a particular country, who participated in sports, compared with the percentage of females who watched them in 2000

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
224 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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