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The chart below shows the results survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.

Given chart illustrates the percentage of demanding coffee and tea among people who live in five Australian cities (Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart). Overall, it can be seen that visiting café is the most popular almost in every city, while buying fresh coffee for own is the least popular. Buying coffee usually happens in Sydney, here it reaches 44 percent in the last four weeks. And in Brisbane results show that only 34 percent of people demand fresh coffee and tea. Furthermore, using instant coffee much more popular in every city. Just over 45 percent of Sydney citizens prefer using instant coffee. The peak of using instant coffee related to people who live in Hobart, where it shows approximately 55 percent. Subsequently, visiting café for having a coffee and tea is the most common habit in every city, except Adelaide. In Sydney, Hobart and Melbourne the percentage is much higher, almost 63 percent. In other two cities there are no big fluctuations. In Brisbane it is only 2 percent higher than using instant ones, whereas in Adelaide this amount is lower for 2 percent.
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Given
chart illustrates the percentage of demanding
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coffee
and tea among
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people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in five Australian
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cities
(Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart).
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that visiting café is the most popular almost in every city, while buying fresh
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coffee
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
is the least popular.

Buying
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coffee
usually
happens in Sydney, here it reaches 44
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percent
in the last four weeks. And in Brisbane results
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show
that
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only
34
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percent
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
demand fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
and tea.
Furthermore
, using instant
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coffee
much more popular in every city.
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Just
over 45
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percent
of Sydney citizens prefer using instant
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coffee
. The peak of using instant
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coffee
related to
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people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in Hobart, where it
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shows
approximately 55 percent.

Subsequently
, visiting café for having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
and tea is the most common habit in every city, except Adelaide. In Sydney, Hobart and Melbourne the percentage is much higher, almost 63
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
. In other two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
there are no
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
fluctuations.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
The comma is probably missing here: “Brisbane, it”.
Brisbane it
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
higher than using instant ones, whereas in Adelaide this amount is lower for 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
.
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IELTS academic The chart below shows the results survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
185 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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